|Reviews for Should Brothers Share Everything?|
| IchigoPudding 12/18/10 . chapter 2
| IchigoPudding 12/18/10 . chapter 1
Aww, so cute.
| XMarisolX 11/3/10 . chapter 2
I feel like there is so much charm in this story, and and I love seeing odd characters play together in the same sandbox-in this case Nate and Keith, who didn't spend much time toghether on the show. But, I think, with a little more fleshing out, it could be great. I would just say, take your time in writing and make sure you check for spelling, punctuation and grammar. Also, really invest in the story, with careful adjectives and flow of writing. Like this, "A few more drinks later and keith got the guts to ask Nate if he'd like to go to his apartment, just to talk, he added quickly." You just forced so much into that one sentence. You might have said, "After a few more drinks, Keith got up more courage to ask Nate a question." "So, um, Nate, wanna, you know, go back to my apartment?" Nate lookd at him with a blank stare. "Just to take," Keith added quickly.
lso, instead of writing from just one character's perspective, you wrote from both, which is not wrong, but was a little jarring since most of the time you seemed to write from Nate's perspective and then you'd pop up with something Keith was thinking. If you're going to make the story from the omnicscient perspective, you might want to make the overall narrative a little more impartial.