No offence, but your grammar is horrible. Capitalization is forgotten, everyting else but period is not used, names are misspelled. And, DO NOT USE SLANG IN WRITTEN TEXT! NO u's ur's etc, learn the difference between its and it's, learn the difference between your and you're ETC. Please check your grammar before posting.

No offense but this sucks.

little bit creepy but awesome

Did you purposely make the story have 666 words?