| Reviews for Clandestine |
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Jazz E. Roisin 3/25/11 . chapter 11This chapter was enjoyable, especially since it had humor. One suggestion: 1) Edgar remained SILENT, narrowing his eyes as he glared up at his brother" Kudos on a Delightful Chapter: Jazz |
demetrifever123 2/22/11 . chapter 10Firstly, I'm overjoyed I make you feel like a yummy poptart. ;D (They're very good. Hehe.) And I don't care if this is short-as it was hot! (Again;D) It's pretty funny, actually. Alan just wakes up like "What the fuck?" and ends up having a big-fat-'o' word. I know this review is much shorter than what this story deserves, but I was never exactly good with 'words'. Why was that in quotes? I don't really know. :P I'll show you the love, hon, just tell me your phone number and where you live-No, I'm just kidding. Haha, I'll mentally send you some. *Concentrates til eyes pop out of head* There! I hope that's enough to motivate you to update soon! XD |
Jazz E. Roisin 2/21/11 . chapter 10I think this chapter adds a good morning after to the previous night. Also, write for yourself, write what you feel is right for the story and people will like and dislike it as they please. But you should be happy posting what you want considering you're the author. Terrific chapter: jazz |
Jazz E. Roisin 2/21/11 . chapter 9This scene was well written. I would suggest however using the actual terms for things, because in this case avoiding correct terminology throws off the reader. (although I knew what you meant) I did enjoy the sudden kissing scene in the kitchen and how they both seem to be accepting their love for each other. Awesome chapter: jazz |
Jazz E. Roisin 2/21/11 . chapter 7This is a good confrontation scene. You do a great job of showing each person's personality and not confusing their voices. This was a great breaker of the earlier angered tension. Great chapter: jazz |
KidSakura 2/20/11 . chapter 10Short or not...I loved it! That's all I have to say. It's just that awesome! Update soon! Your truly, KidSakura |
WHOTHEFUCK 2/3/11 . chapter 9Right. First, I am going to apologize for not reviewing properly for the last...oh, six chapters. Damn. That really makes me out to be an asshole. I don't like that at all and I want to make it perfectly clear that it was not intentional. My internet got shut off months back and it was extremely difficult for me to keep up with reading and reviewing. Complications increased for this particular story, actually, seeing as you shoot chapters out like bullets! And hey, I'm not complaining. I let redeyedcat know through a pm about the situation. Now, since you don't have pms enabled on your account I was unable to let you know directly. So! I apologize for not reviewing. Believe me, it couldn't be helped. Try reading incestuous fanfictions in the library sitting next to an elderly man...not the easiest thing to do, let me tell you. Regarding your latest chapter, There was some great description brought forth here. I really enjoyed it. Everything was in exquisite clarity, very nicely done. I think you are the only person in the LB fandom to write a legitimate sex scene between the Frog Bros. Kudos on that. I will admit I had to pause between paragraphs a couple of times while reading this because yeah, wow. You went there! But it wasn't too over the top and I loved that. It was believable as well because you have taken these two characters and molded them as your own in such a unique way. They could be flying on a magic carpet in Madagascar and it would still be believable because it's how you present the characters as you see them in your head. Mad talent, right there. The shit really has hit the fan hasn't it? I love how Alan backtracks throughout this. Minding Edgar's insecurities; being so gentle and careful. The bit about Alan's dogtags dangling from his neck and clinking together as he leant over his brother gave me goosebumps. Now we're going to get to that dreaded 'The Morning After...' but with a sick twist, right? I am definitely eager to read that. Regarding the other chapters, It looks like you've worked on the whole 'not rushing' thing and it shows in your work. :) All chapters were highly enjoyable in my opinion. Thanks for giving me loads of delicious Frogcest angst to keep myself busy with reading! I can't wait for the next chapter...and I can't wait to actually review it on time. HAHAH! Keep up the good work, Tawny! x |
demetrifever123 1/30/11 . chapter 9Is the 'o' word 'orgasm'? Hehe, I know, right? Those words I have to build up courage to write but I say them so smoothly in conversations. Holy hell that was hot sex! My sex scenes are not very long and yours took up the whole chapter! That was very fun to read;D I'm not sure if I already added this story to my favorites but I'll add it now just to be sure. I was never a fan of Frogcest until I read your stories, and now I'm on the lookout for this stuff:D If I was a guy I would need a hot shower right about now...*wink wink* Another, um, what's another word for AMAZING? This chapter was sooo very hot! I could learn to write better "scenes" in my stories from you! I'll crack out a book and start researching your methods after this;D |
KidSakura 1/30/11 . chapter 9OMG... That was awesome! I mean, damn I love this story! It was soo intense! Oh hell please update soon! Urs truly KidSakura |
Jazz E. Roisin 1/28/11 . chapter 8this chapter does a great job of weaving memory into need. - Amazing Chapter: Jazz |
demetrifever123 1/22/11 . chapter 8Yay, you updated like you promised! I think if I was with someone that had a New Jersey accent I'd be banging my head against a wall. Oh, Alan has to sleep on the couch... Is Melissa looking for a *relationship* with Alan? Imagine if Edgar found out:O "Back off b*tch he's mine!" I can imagine Edgar saying that. Hehe... Poptarts and Solitaire? I'll have to try that;D Another great chapter, yet again! Update as soon as you can:) |
TheNewBrawler 1/22/11 . chapter 8Shiznat. I had no idea Alan was fifteen in this. :0 A very interesting chapter. I loved the quirks of Melissa, and the sort of not-really-interested-finding-it-passsable!Alan. This story has a real off kilter feel that is very attractive. The drama still lurked below. And who knew Alan had been hiding such...thoughts... It was a nice contrast, the zaniness of the present and the darkness lurking underneath. Please update soon. x Red |
demetrifever123 1/21/11 . chapter 7It freaking made my boring ass day so much better when I saw you updated this! Aw, you feel so bad for Edgar. And he kicked Alan out and punched him! Oh my god! Brothers, eh? (Brothers that wanna fck each other.) Another great chapter, Tawny:D Update soon, please! I'm dying to know what happens next! |
KidSakura 1/21/11 . chapter 7Omg I love it! Plze tell me there will be more juicy slash I love this couple I love this story! Need more! Plze update soon Yours truly, KidSakura |
TheNewBrawler 1/21/11 . chapter 7Gawd, I needed a distraction tonight, and this was more than welcome. Drama. Wonderful drama. I liked the conflict in this; very realistic and tense. Update soon, please. I'm on the edge of my seat with this. x Red |