衂｢nosebleed !｣

I love your story XD Do you really have a Niagra Falls story? is it funny? I wanna hear it XD

It was a cute story, but it would have been much better if...:

(Don't take this as flaming you, please. I'm just trying to help you. From one author to another.)

You hadn't put Author's Notes in the middle of the story to add in thoughts about certain scenes. That's why you use a top or bottom A/N section, or perhaps even both. It messes with the flow of the story and makes it hard to read.

Flashbacks and time skips aren't necessarily a good thing. Yes, from time to time, in order to change scenes, they can be used and made to work into a story. However, when using them nearly after every other paragraph makes the story seemed too rushed. For the short length of the story it wasn't really needed. You could have made it longer or even added in a few chapters just so that you could play around with the different scenarios.

Aside from those two things that irked me, a few grammatical errors and having your dialog in the middle of the paragraphs (when talk, you always start a new sentence or paragraph!). I liked it.

I especially liked the ending. And I could totally see Sasuke wearing these various outfits. It was cute, as I said once before.

Anyways, good job. (:

I love it! Thanx so much for writing it for me! It's soo sexy and awesome! Keep up the good work, Mabel!

Yay NaruSasu baby. Make more please.