You should work on this, make it longer, it's a good concept :)

Ren

Provocative...but not quite enough to really get under my skin, you know? I'd like to see this developed. The images you use are fine, and the device of 'who leaves first' is intriguing, but with the last line - I still wanna know who left first, and what happened when neither of them left. Are you going to expand this piece? I quite like the set up of them waiting each other out, kinda predatory, kinda co-dependent. I also loved your use of dialogue...spare but realistic.

So, um, more? And I'm very glad you got over your writer's block.

Very Syd-like. Applause. _