|Reviews for Oh God, No Way!|
| Rafterfreak3 1/9/11 . chapter 1
Its okay. I'm not flaming you but its not the best. You shouldn't write a lemon from a POV unless you've written many. Its easier to write it as if you were watching the scene. Example: "Zero looked at his lover with nothing more than the love he felt for her. She (or you could put her name in) yanked him forward and pressed her soft lips to his. "Shut up." She murrmured, pulling his shirt over his head." Another thing is that it was a bit rushed...sometimes it takes time to describe things. Otherwise, I like the idea. O Even though Lulu/Zero is my bishie.
Also, in the anime, someone else called him Lulu.
| Epouvantable 12/23/10 . chapter 1
This needs work. There are several spelling mistakes, bertania instead of Britannia being one, and the quotation marks were used incorrectly. Situations like this need so much more explanation. How does your OC know Lelouch? Both in and out of the Black Knights apparently. Lelouch is also rather OOC, why would he allow himself to be slapped, or furthermore, unmasked by this girl, Audrina? If readers have no idea who this girl is, or her connection to the show, they probably won't want to read about her suddenly groping and making out with Lelouch. CG has a complex plot and characters, and OCs need to fit in properly otherwise it is jarring to read. Bad spelling and grammar and no backstory does not help that at all. Please spend time developing any new characters and your plot if you are going to share a fic here. A scene that is almost all smut is only really good for canon characters, or at least OCs which you have written about before. I also definitely recommend a beta.