|Reviews for Beginning of the End|
| Sardonic Kender Smile 11/2/12 . chapter 1
I think the style worked! The parentheses were really different but really cool.
I think this line sums the whole work up the best: "(The enemy leaves, for what can a person do with a fatal injury but die?)" The whole thing is very real. Injured people die. They die fast. There's no time for miraculous recoveries or declarations of love or dramatic monologues toward the sky. It's quite real.
And somehow, even though I've been taught in the "show don't tell" approach, and you show that she loves him way before the last line, actually saying "and she loves him" as the last words comes out very strongly. I liked it a lot. I think it's because that kind of is the "real beginning" of the story, and it comes at the end, which is perfect because "The End" is at the beginning. Very cool all around!
| SpeedDemon315 7/26/11 . chapter 1
For an attempt on a differen style, you did a wonderful job. I think it always nice and refreshing to try something different every now and then with one's writing, be it style, syntax, theme, etc., it improves you as a writer.
By the way, you made me love Kent/Lyn so much I will (probably) end up makign sure they reach Support A every time I play Fire Emblem. XD
P.S. Happy Birthday by the way! :D
| FireEdge 4/22/11 . chapter 1
Definitely a different style from what I usually see you write. But I think it turned out nicely. The sort of detached POV (does that make sense, haha?) made the story less emotional (than your other works) when you read through it. But this isn't necessarily a bad thing, since I think that it gives the appropriate feel for what Lyn is going through in the story. It's brief and doesn't really register until the end. So overall, I think it turned out rather well.
| RawkHawk2.0 2/15/11 . chapter 1
Sorry I haven't reviewed. I've been tackled with a flood of fic updates. Anyway, this is a very well written story, as usual. My only complaint... I actually didn't realize this was you until I read it. I hunt for "Kitten Kisses". Oh well. Regardless, you continue to dazzle me with your authoring prowess.
| Raphiael 1/25/11 . chapter 1
The styling here is extremely effective - chaotic and to the point, without too much description or extraneous detail. It's not necessary to know, here, when this is happening, or where it is; it works well enough that the reader can decide for themselves.
[But there are entrails mixed with the warm stickiness, and her fingers tremble as the realization dawns on her that he will not live more than a minute. (And what is a minute, she thinks, but two times blinking, and she refuses to blink for fear she will, in those fractions of seconds, not see him.)] - best lines, right there.
The present tense also works well here, and I don't just say that because of my own fondness for it. It adds an element of connection to it, really, I feel more like I'm right there watching this happen, and I feel helpless reading it.
(this is a good thing.)
And, uh, one last thing. I /love/ that you didn't ignore the battle, that you didn't spare Lyn even a moment to stay with the body and grieve. Falling into that trap would have pushed things into melodrama, I think, rather than the effective, devastating piece it is.
| The Exile 1/25/11 . chapter 1
Poor Kent :( gnyah... FE deaths... brr...
Well written, very poignant. I liked the fact that Lyndis was truly in grief about Kent's death but still sensible enough to realise that she couldn't just stop what she was doing, that they had still won the battle, and that it wasn't as simple as just avenging him against the one who had personally slain him.
Small typo - 'she will allow herself a moment a grieve'.
| Xirysa 1/25/11 . chapter 1
So this was really kind of awesome. Yeah.
You should write stuff like this more often. Just saying.
But awwww, Kent.
Yeah, dude. I really like this.
I'm stupid so I can't really say much else at the moment. Sorry.
BUT IT WAS ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS. 8D