Sorry for the long delay in reviewing this chapter - I assure you it was not from lack of interest but from lack of time, as I've been quite busy over the last few months with work, my research seminar, family health crises, and personal relationship issues. I might still be a bit sluggish with the next chapter, but I try :P

Anyways, despite your admonishment that this chapter was filler, I rather enjoyed seeing some Tuffnut characterization. His desire to train with someone besides Ruffnut is an interesting and realistic approach to their maturing relationship and a dynamic I like seeing - where they become individuals instead of always just the solid unit of Ruff and Tuff.

Ruff's reaction to Tuff's decision to leave was spot on, but his motivations also read as realistic, not as an arbitrary way to cause conflict for the sake of conflict. I certainly empathize with Tuffnut's desire here - I think I've mentioned this before but I always felt bad that they had to share a dragon on top of sharing everything else, as I know if it was me I would want to have a dragon to bond with all to myself.

This was also an intriguing look at the twins' home life, which is grimmer than expected given the humour we usually see from them.

I also appreciated your research on sword-fighting tactics and the reality of weaponry - especially how heavy it can be - as it always grates on me when Mary-Sues pick up weapons and use them with ease. It was also nice to see Snotlout displaying some skills instead of just being the lout or comic relief we've been seeing in the show recently.

Anyways, can't wait to get to the next chapter, sorry in advance if I'm slow about it!

This particular chapter provides some context to you summary; that trouble is a brewin' in ye olde Berk. Hiccup finds a supportive and sympathetic ear when seeking the advice of Freygerd, prodded by Toothless. I am curious in what you had Freygerd say to Toothless to cause the reaction you portray.

Again, I am surprised at the amount of time you spend to describe each scene. The entire chapter covers a period of time that is probably under an hour, but you manage to pack it with a thorough description of the playfullness of Toothless, the pain suffered by Hiccup, to the wonderfully detailed description of Freygerd's house. I could imagine the low-hanging jars and Hiccup's interaction. Your detailed description of Freygerd is followed by her history and the air of command that she possesses.

And I see that you have Hiccup learn about Dragons through observation. I know of only a few other stories that take that path, and I feel this is the proper one with respect to the events that occurred in the movie.

Excellent chapter.
Best.
EWO2010

And with the end of back story from the movie you spend one whole chapter defining the personality of one character. I found it amazing that you were able spend so much time to effectively detail Jaspin. His interaction with Bitequick, his pestering of Gobber and the pointed question he asked Hiccup provides the reader with a fully developed character.
So I am duly impressed with the work of this chapter in the details you provide for just one character.

Excellent work.
Best.
EWO2010

You started in the previous chapter to show the underlying tension present in the Vikings. That thread is continued here in your detailed vignette of Stoick. Your writing of his feelings and reactions to the changes made by Hiccup to HIS village portrays not only the frustration but in some ways, helplessness that he mus deal with.
How Stoick is dealing with the change is a stark contrast to that of his best friend, Gobber. The fact that you have him befriend a Boneknapper (to stay in canon with the previous material) but also several Terrors leaves the reader that there was a betrayal.
But, this contrast pales to the 'curve' you 'threw' by having Stoick raise the question if they are still Vikings. The reaction of these two shows another depth to the tension you present in the story. How it plays out is to be seen.

Well done.
Best.
EWO2010

In this one short chapter, you are able to provide the reader the type of society you envision, one where the hunters share their efforts with the tribe. You also give the reader a keen insight into the struggling relationship present between Astrid and Hiccup. And as I found, details details details. It was evident in the description of the work on the tunic and the interaction between the two teens. It is fascinating how much the reader can infer from the conversations you create. You also bring out one of the themes of your story, namely the continuing antipathy between Berk's Vikings and dragons but mainly the Vikings.

So again an excellent chapter. On to the next.
Best.
EWO2010

I have to thank Anhedral for telling me about this piece of treasure, having the opportunity to read it several times now. You have done a remarkable job in bringing your characters to life, especially Jaspin. Since this appears to be an introduction, I will provide additional reviews and insights throughout this novel.

Excellent work.
EWO2010

Really? Posted me as guest? OK then:

Before I comment on anything else, I’d like to say how much I liked the idea of the children seeing “function following the form” of the eggs of each species of dragon. To me, that seems to be so humorous and pure-of-thought the way children imagine the world to be. Very well written!

And then I step into. the. abyss...

While I fall, I'll reflect on the chapter and the story to this point. I read this and agree this is a cliff to go over- both in tenor of the chapter (yeah, it’s dark) and in the change of direction for the characters. Anhedral points out in his review that Yrsa’s hesitation in ringing the bell is in seeing his dreams and new life torn asunder. It’s sad to think that’s the division bell with each side once more lining up: dragons against humans. Then I realized that a good many of the adults would find this a positive turn of events, something they can hold onto and understand. Yes, this is quite a deep hole to climb (or fly) out of.

But, from the outset of this story you have also shown the other side, both for the dragons as well as the humans. One of the points I take away from the movie is that one person can make a difference. Now, you have set up several people and dragons. In addition, an increasing number of the Vikings know that “dragons are people.” Isn’t just Hiccup this time. My money’s on Jaspin and Nailbiter… erm, I mean Bitequick in playing a big part. One question is begged by this- if the communication is now starting to trickle both ways, will Toothless (and Bitequick) have some ‘splainen to do?

Great Chapter.
Cheers, T.
-who is hopeful at Blindwhite somehow escaping. But poor Kettlecrack: there without even his ‘dragon hitting stick.’ So sad.

Before I comment on anything else, I’d like to say how much I liked the idea of the children seeing “function following the form” of the eggs of each species of dragon. To me, that seems to be so humorous and pure-of-thought the way children imagine the world to be. Very well written!

And then I step into. the. abyss...

While I fall, I'll reflect on the chapter and the story to this point. I read this and agree this is a cliff to go over- both in tenor of the chapter (yeah, it’s dark) and in the change of direction for the characters. Anhedral points out in his review that Yrsa’s hesitation in ringing the bell is in seeing his dreams and new life torn asunder. It’s sad to think that’s the division bell with each side once more lining up: dragons against humans. Then I realized that a good many of the adults would find this a positive turn of events, something they can hold onto and understand. Yes, this is quite a deep hole to climb (or fly) out of.

But, from the outset of this story you have also shown the other side, both for the dragons as well as the humans. One of the points I take away from the movie is that one person can make a difference. Now, you have set up several people and dragons. In addition, an increasing number of the Vikings know that “dragons are people.” Isn’t just Hiccup this time. My money’s on Jaspin and Nailbiter… erm, I mean Bitequick in playing a big part. One question is begged by this- if the communication is now starting to trickle both ways, will Toothless (and Bitequick) have some ‘splainen to do?

Great Chapter.
Cheers, T.
-who is hopeful at Blindwhite somehow escaping. But poor Kettlecrack: there without even his ‘dragon hitting stick.’ So sad.

Whoa, how long have you been brewing *this*? Answer: only for 23 chapters and 160,000 words.

The story is a remarkable achievement of plot and pacing. For although you warned us from the outset that things would take a much darker turn, there has never been any sense of drag, no writing that was just 'filler', in any part of what went before. Indeed, one of the strengths of this story is the complexity of its structure, all the mini-arcs of character development and plotting that we know are nested within a greater whole that you've concealed from us - until now. In short, you've created a diverse cast of wonderful characters that the reader has really come to care about, only to toss them into the maelstrom. Cruel, but brilliant.

There are some quite wonderful descriptions strewn through this chapter that I really must single out as particularly striking: Gobber as "the patchwork man"; Nightmare hatchlings as "featherless gulls with a bad case of sunburn"; the air "twisting and coiling like a maddened snake"; the descriptions of light falling on, and reflected from, the raiding Nadder. Each one vivid and memorable, yet woven so effortlessly into their respective passages that we're left wondering how they could have been written any other way. Really good work with the descriptions all through this chapter. Oh, and your names are fantastic! Oddlog, Bitequick, Bitterbug - loved 'em all.

We have spoken before now about the use of melancholy in storytelling, and there are a couple of passages here in which you show just how well you can control it. The first comes when Signy and Yrsa muse on the disappearance of the dragons, their sadness on remembrance of times past, and culminating in Yrsa's hesitation before ringing the bell, understanding what his action will mean. The second again involves a boy and a girl, but rather older ones, and the feeling is edgier, more intense. Jaspin's empathy for what Herdis is going through warms us tremendously to his character - and it's notable that, although Jaspin has 'grown up' to the extent he now sees himself as fisherman, dragon rider and warrior, the one thing that hasn't changed, not one bit, is his commitment to his dragon.

But more than just the melancholy, we're getting ever-stronger vibes of the potential repercussions of these human-dragon bonds for both species. None of the characters seem fully aware of them as yet, but when you wrote Herdis' reaction to the loss of her Nadder, her whole demeanour and speech spoke to me of emotional ties to her reptile that both Hiccup and Jaspin have already referred to as 'love'. Truly, Herdis seems to be in mourning at this point. I really like the understated way you wrote this passage.

And now the only dragons remaining in the village seem to be the ones who have bonded most strongly to humans - as if humans are somehow protecting their dragons, unknowingly, from the Queen's call. The subtlety with which you handled these themes was an absolute joy to read.

The final sections were, of course, quite wonderful. The boar-hunting and storm episodes were nicely imagined, and Grimjaws' reluctance to carry the kill was both intriguing, and effective in suggesting that the dragon may possess some moral principles that the human does not. From then on, we get a slow-cooking yet ever growing sense of dread, finally culminating in the scene when Kettlecrack finds himself facing a far worse enemy than any he could have expected. Great pacing in these final scenes!

I'll stop now, if only to give you more time to work on the next chapter:) Wonderful work, as ever - I'm looking forward keenly to what comes next.

I liked this chapter very much - a short step aside to see your take on a character many authors find it more convenient to ignore altogether. We certainly can't accuse you of that!

The chapter splits neatly into two extended scenes, and as with everything you write, the pacing, the level of detail on character interactions, and your wonderful descriptions all make for a really satisfying read. The sword-fighting episode in the first half gives the impression of detailed research into the technology of the period and in fighting techniques; I had no idea that short swords were used in combination with heavy shields as you describe. But what's most impressive about this first half is the way the actions and the weaponry are used to flesh out the characterisations, rather than being included for their own sake.

Snotlout uses some striking imagery in comparing long and short swords: a 'storm' versus 'lightning.' It is an evocative and memorable comparison, but part of me wonders if Snotlout would ever analyse anything in those terms, as he’s always struck me as being too unimaginative and literal-minded to come out with phrases of that sort. But then again, fighting is so much part of his life, so imprinted on his personality, that for him to 'relate' to weapons as you describe does seem logical.

There's a delicious moment when Tuffnut half-blurts out his reason for not wanting to train with Astrid; she's talking with her Nadder now and that's unsettled the young man. Why is it I like the notion of that so much? I had a good laugh at that point. And I loved the end of that scene, after Snotlout has left. You use more superb descriptions here; one I particularly liked was 'Whitecaps were marching toward the shore like foaming soldiers coming to attack the broken stones of Berk's rocky beach.' And then Tuff's puzzlement at the co-operative fishing by the dragons, at which moment we're invited to consider the weakness and vulnerability of the isolated human, in contrast to the strength of a multi-species dragon grouping, working together and perfectly fitted to their environment. Impressive stuff!

The second half of the chapter was, if anything, even better. I've never thought to dig into the complex psyche of twins, but your description of their mutual reliance (or should we say co-dependence?) seems plausible and convincing, even with the added complication of a two-headed dragon. Your portrayal of the disabled father is done with great sensitivity and sympathy to his character. So seldom do we see the effects injuries like this tackled at all in fiction, but you capture it all wonderfully well - the quirks in Eirik's behaviours, his moments of lucidity and his retention of specific skills. The needle-making was beautifully described; as with the swordfight earlier, I found whole episode really well thought through and researched, and carefully set out with regard to flow.

Eventually we reach the crux of if: Tuff's ambition to be someone 'important', a 'whole person', to change himself; and yet the obstacles in his path seem insurmountable, at least without hurting those he cares for. At the start of the chapter we know next to nothing about Tuffnut; by the end, not only do we feel that we know him well, but we manage to feel genuine empathy for his situation. You are too self-deprecating in your endnote; you should not apologise, because there is much here to enjoy and to learn from in terms of effective characterisation and structuring of a narrative. You said before that 'Fate' was your high-water mark, but chapters like this seem to me every bit as well crafted, and the tide is still rising.

You think this is filler? I read the sections on the fighting twice, and I gotta say (not being a Viking, mind you) that the explanation Snot gives at the types of swords, and the personalities behind them, was stunning. I have no idea if you made that up or did research, but I now don't want to see any one with a short-sword coming at me. Ok... I don't want to see someone with a broad-sword coming at me either, but you get my point ;-). That writing worked.

What had me thinking long after I finished this chapter was the atmosphere you painted for Tuff: the life he was born to... and written into most of the time. Is it something I think about quite often in the characters I've come to like; about how they might age, mature, or 'wake up and look around.' Many times this might not be agreeable or amusing. As readers are creating words, might I take the liberty? To me these thoughts are "Pleasentville-esque" in my mind. But this is one real road a maturing Tuff might go down: if allowed real feelings and ideas about a 'grass-is-greener' existence. Filler? Not with that home life.

What a great chapter: one that has kept me thinking about Tuff, Ruff, their home life, where they fit in this story (what they don't yet know) and the fact he (and she) might not want to simply wear the "red shirts" any more.

Cheers, T.
-who is also left to wonder how he will tell Bjarki.

This was a good chapter. It reminded me of high school. How people struggle to define what they were and weren't and mostly self acceptance.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. -Marianne Williamson

Okay man this is... this is...

I'm going to take the pleasure of inventing a word, or so I hope. This is seatstickingly. (Hah! I was right! My spellchecker complains!) I started reading *Broken* about... 20 hours ago? Perhaps a bit less. While I'm not very a fan of fanfics that suggest a "dark future" after the movie / series, I found something when reading this one that I liked; I was not able to pinpoint exactly what it was until I read the reveal to Astrid in Chapter 2 and then was able to reflect on some things. Hiccup tells Astrid that he and Toothless almost died that one time (no, not _that_ one time, Astrid was there for that one).

That allowed me to see things with a different perspective which I found apparent. That you were willing to pick small details, small hooks left hanging in the movie, and unroll them in ways that made them extend in a playful manner, perhaps connect together. Your way of working the screentime of various characters by portraying their work as activities and duties rather than a big ball of daily interaction helps following things a lot, I have to say so far the Stoick segments are the easiest to read, I guess the fact that right after the movie he is the character left with the most "overdue" emotional torque helps a lot.

There were some more details like that one across the various chapters, of course accompanied by the plot and the characterization, but what pretty much forced me to stop and review was Chapter 7 (Dragons do not weep). The reveal you threw in there, and its consequences, in an in-universe perspective, were powerful and magnificent, handled in a sensible manner, rooted in elements of the movie that were more or less calling to be picked up (Toothless "drawing", Toothless having closed his eyes as he waited for his death being another) and delved into in a manner that doesn't lead to grimdark or emoness, but rather in a manner that seems to present the facts without judgment and let the characters as themselves, and not the setting, to make their choices.

All in all very beautiful so far, and this one was a very interesting chapter that turned things around. It is also the chapter that has me decide to keep reading this (and probably pull yet another all-nighter).

I know, of course, that I'm fairly far behind and perhaps this issue has been addressed already in the story, but there was one line in the entire chapter that left me with a sensation that there was still an inner barrier, a matter of balance, between Hiccup and Toothless that could be left hanging. It is right after Hiccup explains the night he "tore [Toothless] out off the sky".

'Hiccup stared unhappily. He swallowed to clear the lump in his throat and muttered softly, "Yes, you're right. Fair payment." '

Fair payment, perhaps. But then again, perhaps a necessary payment? I don't recall much of the movie nor how or if was this ever addressed, but I've always entertained the possibility (wishful certainty I have to admit) that the reason Hiccup lost his left foot is *specifically* because Toothless saved him. A life or limb decision while the two fell and the dragon had to find a way to get a grip on the human and enfold him, perhaps. Do you roll with that one? And if so will we see (or have seen already) the consequences? I would presume Hiccup does know...

It has a certain romance to it... it does balance the balance (yay redundancy!) between the two even more, considering the "artificial leg artificial tail" scene at the end of the movie. Both took off each other's limb as part of a sacrifice, both help restore each other's freedom lost as a result of that.

Anyway, I have to return to keep reading this. Probably after dinnertime or something.

And no, it wasn't really "emo", don't worry. It was and is so far an incredibly sensible and respectful story.

I had not realised how much I'd been missing your dragon-POV chapters till I read this one. And what a ride you give us! Toothless' introspection at the beginning is wonderful, and the way you portray his self-doubt and his imperfections is as skilled as it is unusual. When you describe his strong sense of responsibility as watcher and as First Hunter coupled with his inadequacy in the role (as he perceives it), I could not help but draw some parallels with your portrayal of Stoick in the last chapter.

You refer briefly to Toothless' conversation with Stoick, implying that it had a positive outcome. I'd love to see that scene set out in more detail at some point. Perhaps you'll cover it in the next chapter.

I was also struck, once again, by the vocabulary you allow your dragons; how you twist common phrases and words to make a better fit to their way of life. Your simple but effective evocation of aspects of the natural world is one example of this (the season of 'green'; the notion of 'rough airs' meaning difficult times). But the instance I liked the best was the idea of a dragon's words having 'lift' rather than 'weight' when they achieve the desired effect. So, so clever!

I also liked the consistency with previous chapters, for instance the 'This you know / this I know' format of the storytelling first seen in chapter 13.

Crush Claw continues to emerge as an attractive character with some interesting traits of his own. His supposed feeling of guilt at breaking the truce, his subsequent confession and his devotion to Iceblood evokes strong sympathy in the reader, and that final line - 'He is the only one that would have me' - is so very poignant. The inversion of who's training whom when seen from the dragon's perspective would be funny if it didn't also carry the foreboding of many 'rough airs' ahead.

I had to think a bit about the identity of the 'deepsinger', going through various deep-water fish until I realised - of course, a young whale! No wonder Toothless was impressed.

Ah, that closing scene at the Fire Nest - what a great lead-in to future chapters. And what's this? Spin-off stories too? That's really exciting. Would they need to be based in the HTTYD world, or are we possibly looking at a new 'universe' of your own? Whichever it is, this reader for one isn't going anywhere.

I think you're safe enough as a human for now. Just be careful of any Nadders that might start singing to you. Oh, wait a minute - that's *my* story!

Wow, another update so soon after the last one - I'm feeling spoiled!

I rather liked Toothless' musings about the birds and that to dragons they are considered prey and not kin, despite how they share the skies. After all, just because birds are related to dinosaurs doesn't mean they have any connection to dragons... In fact, this whole chapter was enjoyable to me because of the details of dragon cultural insights you included. It's clear you take great pains to develop dragon culture as separate from humans but just as sophisticated.

I will admit that I have this mental image of Kettlecrack hissing and sputtering and chucking eels at a very cowed Monstrous Nightmare, and this cartoonish image amuses me to no end, haha. I just find the idea of someone carrying around a basket of eels to throw at people strangely hilarious, especially out of context XD

That aside, you're whetting our appetites to know exactly what is still lurking on Fire Nest... I imagine that if whatever it is teamed up with my Plagueling, our combined antagonists are going to make the inhabitants of Berk wet themselves.

I don't think you'll find any of us complaining if your story leads to further tales, by the way :)