|
| Reviews for Dain Sees the Light |
|---|
   RaineYlevol 4/7/13 . chapter 5blackrose17-the misspellings were intentional :) jasmine isn't very literate yet, so her spelling sort of sucks. thanks for reading! |
| blackrose17 4/3/13 . chapter 5 meet you cattle this is how you spell them |
| evil-angel-sakura 1/15/13 . chapter 19 I love the story!It's amazing :) Forever Dain x Jasmine |
| Echobaby123 1/7/13 . chapter 19 I love this story! Please write the next chapter! |
| Darkness2468 1/5/13 . chapter 17 OMG WHERE IS CHAPTER 18! |
| Lasmineluvr99 11/21/12 . chapter 16 That was a really... good(?) chapter. The writing was fantastic. |
| D 11/21/12 . chapter 16 Erm... good writing... *_* |
| Lasmineluvr99 10/19/12 . chapter 15 I love that the title of this chapter is Dun dun dunn... It's hilarious. |
| Lasmineluvr99 10/19/12 . chapter 14 Frack. |
| Vandalia Sakura 10/9/12 . chapter 14 Yay! You updated! Was the person at the end Lief?Doom? I can't wait to find out! |
| Blessed Yet Cursed 7/22/12 . chapter 13 Even thhough it's not Lasmine... It makes a really touching story;) KeeP it up:) |
| Vandalia Sakura 7/17/12 . chapter 13 Awwww. Teary eyed while reading this. Loved the chapter |
| Lasmineluvr99 7/14/12 . chapter 13 Cool! Another chapter ALREADY! That was fast! |
| Lasmineluvr99 7/13/12 . chapter 13 Nice chapter... CURSE YOU INVENTOR OF THE CLIFFHANGER, CURSE YOU! |
| Guest 7/7/12 . chapter 12 This is a amazing story. You have a brilliant plot and great character interaction. Grammar is pretty good as have characterization and you put much more detail into how the main characters are feeling. There are a few things you need to corect do. First:Describe the backround and scenery(castle,garden,forest,tees) more,explain where the objects and other details are. For example:you should have described the path Jasmine and Dain were on, or the castle's roof, or the hallway and rooms in the castle, the garden... Second:Your whole story only describes your two main characters, you should have put more feelings and thoughts from the other characters(mainly Doom, Barda,Ghlaton and maybe some others(Nerida)). I think its sweet how Dain and the Gnomes have become friends and you did a great job with fitting the characters psichs with the story. It's really realistic! I just love it! :) Third:The chapters feel (and are) quite short, even do in one chapter a lot happens. You'll fill that hole if you take my first and second advice. Remember this is your story and I for one can't wait until the next chapter. Update soon! Jasmine X Dain FOFEVER! Starless Skyline |
