| Reviews for Gold Eyed Personal Jesus |
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LordxXxofxXxDorkness 8/23/11 . chapter 14OH MY GOD I LOVED IT!-Happy hugs- Poor Isaac though. I don't think his heart can take much more of this! I have the sudden urge to paint their historic romance!- runs off to find good referance pictures, cackling in delight- Dude, this- THIS- is a cliffy done right. Good job! |
Lady Talla-doe 8/23/11 . chapter 14*body grappling cling* OH SWEET GODS IF YOU KILL HIM I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU. O_o *twitchs and hyperventilates* I DUNN WANT HIM TO DIIIIEEEEEE, I want a dramatic rescue that ends in kinky monkey sex high up somewhere were they can see the city. Oooh, happy image! :D |
saichick-Anna-Erishkigal 8/23/11 . chapter 14Executed? I will say you captured the essence of a mockery of a trial fairly well, and, coming from me, that's a compliment. Very Kafka-esqe. Now, I suppose, you're going to be chuckling in your corn flakes all week while you leave your poor readers dangling from a string? Sometimes writers like things pointed out to them that would make a scene better. Personally, the hardest thing for me to get with my OWN writing so I might make it even better is good, honest, constructive suggestions. So ... if you want it ... here's some suggestions (and if you don't ... ignore me). At the end when they announce Ezekial is going to be executed, you might add another couple of lines where Isaac goes through the disbelief/denial stage before he gets to the numb stage. Add more physical movement if you don't want him to speak to betray what he is feeling. I.e., -Msgr. says 'to be executed. -'Executed?' -Isaac stands up. Whispers "Ezekial' or 'No ..." -Priestess puts hand on arm. -Guard swears or hits Ezekial (take your pick). (then go into your existing dialogue) -Just before he follows Ezekiel back to the jail, Priestess whispers some sort of warning to be discreet or some such thing. ***Just a suggestion. This is the man/vampire he loves. Disbelief/denial would be more prolonged than that of a bystander. Priest is used to suppressing his emotions and not getting emotionally involved. Now ... he IS involved. His reactions would be harder to control because he's not used to having these feelings. His friends would need to rein him in more. Also ... when Ezekiel removes his hat and they see the cross, a real courtroom audience would be much more disruptive. There would be a buzz about him being a priest. Perhaps shouting? Audience members booing or calling him a traitor? Others challenging the church about how a priest got to be a vampire? There would be more disruption when Ezekiel announces the train full of vampires that got blown up outside the city. The citizens were told there WAS no more vampire threat. There would be anger in the audience. The judge/msgr would probably have to shout order and threaten to have anyone who disrupts the proceedings removed. Once again, it would take your already realistic kangaroo court scene and add a bit more of reality to it (I've seen judges throw people out of their courtroom simply for rolling their eyes). Feel free to use or adapt or ignore as you see fit. If you don't want these kinds of suggestions, just let me know and I'll shut up. I enjoy your story and I'm going to keep reading it. :-) |
LordxXxofxXxDorkness 8/21/11 . chapter 13-Is in the midst of shooting you- Oh, you're welcome! Now I know we've been over this before, sweetie-shall we say it together? CLIFF HANGERS ARE EVIL, AND SHOULD BE SHOT ON SIGHT. Bad Gemeni, bad! -hits with rolled up newspaper- But it was a wonderful chapter! I like the fact taht we all know taht he's going to break out and beat them all up. It makes me feel very smuggly satisfied...even those this chapter is completely and utterly evil. I thought you loved us, Gem! WHy, for the love of noodles? |
Doni 8/21/11 . chapter 13You and your darn cliffhangers! Bet you're proud of yourself. ;) Can't wait for more! |
sweetlover 8/21/11 . chapter 13 thank u for updating cant wait for new goodnight,still love it. |
Lady Talla-doe 8/21/11 . chapter 13HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEHE! OH MY GOD THAT WAS WONDERFUL CONFLICT! Oh sweet love, I adore confict |
saichick-Anna-Erishkigal 8/21/11 . chapter 13Perhaps Priestess was the one who ratted him out? She -did- seem to have a lot of suppressed affection for Isaac in the movieverse. So ... how do they kill vampires after a trial? Decapitation? Hanging? Hung and quartered? The rack? Spread their bodies with honey naked in the public square and release biting ants? It's amazing how 'cool' Isaac is playing this while his insides are churning. I'd be like, "Arrghhh!' Looking forward to the next chapter. |
EmpressBlack 8/21/11 . chapter 12I'm really enjoying this story so far. I have nothing bad to say about it_. So keep them coming!_ |
sweetlover 8/21/11 . chapter 12 Hey i just watched priest and i love your paring and how this is all happening in the comics were espicially good,and i cant wait for the next chapter in the story i just love for the read bye. |
Raven Black 8/20/11 . chapter 12This is lovely and i can't wait for more! I just watched the movie an hour ago and decided to look for a fic to read. I'mexcited to have found yours. Looking forward to the next chappy! |
Halee 8/20/11 . chapter 12 This is a wonderful story! Thank you for writing it. Honestly, this is the first longfic I have found for this pairing. I was beginning to believe that I would never find anything for this. Thanks, and can't wait for the next chapter! |
Risi-Chan 8/17/11 . chapter 12I love this fic! Please, please, please update soon! |
Lady Talla-doe 8/17/11 . chapter 12I'M SO PROUD. *tearwipe* I'LL WRITE PORN. TO SHOW MY PRIDE :D Hurr hurr hurr *perverted face* FYI, I'm totally using your name for BH. ;D it is so incredibly shaggable. just Uumph *pelvic thrust* ON AU SEXY HOT TIMEZ COMING UPPPPPP. |
Doni 8/16/11 . chapter 12Not fillets, but some adorable fluff before what sounds like some drama hits. Nicely done. |