wheeee! i like this one too.)

Oh no! I'm becoming a stalker (lol). But this piece seems so interesting, I couldn't resist. *grin
I like it. The way you use th spacing so it seems like you're slowing down, and the bolds emphasise the words perfectly. And the brackets are like the (whisperthoughts). In other words, I think you use symbols effectively.
Or maybe I'm reading too much into it? (That would be embarrassing, haha /, but it wouldn't be the first time
I'm so biased (because I love freeverse, love, love, love freeverse)! But I do have a comment to make, I would like to know more about Daphne's reason for staying away! Haha. Well, maybe just expand on the reason. Oh, I'm so selfish. It's actually an okay length already, fitting.

Good job!
PS: And I did check out your recommendation. And now I'm hooked.

You good writers are so evil, making us hopelessly addicted like that (lol). Awww.

This was so beautiful! I liked it a lot!

We need more Theo fics!

This is breathtaking. Your writing is absolutely beautiful, and there are so many stunning descriptions in here, I'd pretty much be repeating the whole poem if I told you my favorites. But it's really, really gorgeous.