Really amazing story so far! Having played RIFT for over a year now I had wondered if there was any fan fiction created for either Defiant or Guardian. This is a very well-written story with nice intrigue, strong primary character interactions, and some great explainations for how characters in the game might view the RIFT experience. I look forward to more chapters in this story and will recommend it to my friends who also play the game. Great job!

a bit of editing/revision wouls be a very good thing - the top middle paragraphs are a little confusing.
Changing 'voice' doesn't mean going from clear writing to jumbles.

nice twist.
opt for something other than "fuck"

Very good begining - though I got confused as to the protagonist's and the 1st tech's 'race' in this paragraph: (...) I found myself staring face to face with a middle aged Eth man, who was smiling as if he had just defeated Regulos all by himself. While I cannot claim that I am like a sister to the Eth, I was quite close to them for the majority of my life (...).

I assume the tech is Kelari and not Eth.

That was an interesting take on soul ascension. It actually makes sense, too.

Looking forward to more.

-Maelstrom

Update! You need to update! Please! :)

Great job! It's aweseome so far!