I've always found it odd. You are, in my humble opinion, one of the best FoR writers in style, organization, and plain getting into the character. I wish I was as good...

Anyway, just a couple of comments:

Wasn't Tokiya supposedly very intelligent for his age? That's why I feel as if the diction is understandable, even if most kids don't talk quite like that.

What struck me most about this story is how you showed the relationship between Meguri Kyouza and a young Tokiya, and how Tokiya wanted to please his master. Kinda ironic, considering that years later, the Hokage would try and open him up and partly succeed, even if he didn't like it. ^_^

Anyway, it's a refreshing look on something that I feel has been overused: an introspective Mikagami Tokiya fic. Even for a school assignment, your quality never ceases to amaze me.

Cute ficlet for an assignment! The conveyed emotions were great, as well as the way you wrote it. Yes, it has long words and a general feeling of "adult-ness" but anyway Tokiya was supposed to be kinda smart for his age, ne? ^o^ Overall this fic was pretty good. I know this can stand alone, but are you gonna continue? If you will, I'll be waiting. Ja! ^o~