|Reviews for Gone to the Grave|
| half-smudged handprints 12/26/12 . chapter 1
que bonita; me encanta.
| Flower in the Bloom 1/17/12 . chapter 1
I love how you show petunia, in her real form, a mother who had made mistakes but really loves Harry and her sister. Beutifly writin :)
| XxXRegretXxX 12/13/11 . chapter 1
Great job. I really enjoyed this story.
I did spot a few spelling errors, but nothing major.
Keep up the good work! :)
| R.G.B.The.Duckie 9/9/11 . chapter 1
This was a really good story which a thoroughly enjoyed.
I feel more often than not Petunia can be thought of as mean character. But in your story really explained her as a character and explained why she was so mean. I liked how throughout the whole thing you kept the idea of comparing Petunias failures to Lily’s successes. I thought Petunia would have been a little bit more envious of this. But you didn’t really focus on this. More going into detail about Petunia after Lily had died. I quite liked how Petunia wanted to make up with Lily, but only got the courage to when it was already too late. How she reacted to this I thought was done very well.
Your spelling and grammar was very good. There was the odd mistake but really it was very minor. I thought that the flow was very good. As I said before, the repetitive idea of Lily being better, I thought this in particular made the whole story link itself together quite well.
I thought your take on the theme you were given was very original. You really made it your own. I did feel that the story itself wasn’t really about motherhood however, but you kept mentioning it. I think if you’d just focused on motherhood in one section, and then carried on, it would have been better then pulling the idea through the whole story.
Overall I thought this was a really original story. I really did like it and think you have done a great job. Thank you for entering the 61 themes competition. I’m not going to reveal my scores, but results should be up soon after the due date :)
| xakemii 9/9/11 . chapter 1
Your grammar in this was exceptional. There were a few moments when I was wondering whether you were talking about Lily or Petunia, but I figured that out soon enough. I loved the repetitive idea of Lily being more a success than Petunia. There were a few misplaced commas, but honestly, there wasn’t anything that really hindered my enjoyment of the piece. I would advise that you look over your simile of Petunia being like a fallen star. I feel that you could’ve easily split that into two sentences and avoided the awkward use of a hyphen and misplaced commas.
The sudden ‘you’ in the piece irked me a little bit. I know it’s the idea of involving the audience and whatnot, but I do feel that it was unnecessary and that it didn’t add any substance to the piece.
Again, your characterization in this was exceptional. You really explained Petunia’s reaction to her sister’s death and her relationship with Lily on the whole. My only qualm would be that although you did tell us everything about this part of Petunia’s life, you didn’t really show us. Fortunately, this worked in your favor to your writing style in this, but I really would’ve liked to see some interaction (perhaps a memory) of sorts. Again, Petunia was a darling character in this
and I think you did her justice.
Something that I do really like about this is that it doesn’t centre around the idea of Witch vs. Muggle. It’s more about the struggle that Petunia has coming to terms with Lily’s natural talents in life—ones that Petunia doesn’t possess herself. Your third section…well, the timeline confused me somewhat and I feel you could’ve structured it a bit better, but I did get the gist of what you were saying.
The theme of motherhood was fantastic. Yes, you may have lent more to the idea of sisterhood, but the motherhood theme was still strong and it was used extremely well in the piece.
Overall, you entered a very strong, enjoyable piece. I feel that you relied on your prompts a little bit too much, but they were woven in such a way that it was blatantly obvious, so that’s not so bad. Again, I really would’ve liked to see something, rather than to have it told to me straight out, but I can see that you tried to redeem yourself with the use of similes and metaphors. The term ‘bitch’ stood out to me, just because it seemed to be so much harsher than the rest of the piece. Honestly, I’m not really sure whether I liked it or not, but it seemed worthy of a mention. So yes, overall, well done on this strong piece and I wish you the best of luck with your other scores.
Also, I've been told not to review with the scores, but if you were interested, please PM me. The same applies should you have any queries about this review. (:
| renzhie 8/15/11 . chapter 1
I loved this other side of Petunia, it's like I imagined what she really felt because no one could be that horrible just because of jealousy, especially if blood's involved. It's sweet and heartbreaking and I love this fic. I love your writing, you know, and your idea always amazes me. )
Great job, and keep writing! :D
| Zireael07 8/11/11 . chapter 1
Brilliant story! I love this look at Petunia!
| jade2nightwing 8/11/11 . chapter 1
That was good.
| creature of consequences 8/11/11 . chapter 1
I love it. Really, really love it :). It's an amazingly angsty and sad drabble. The part about how she wrote the letters but sent them too late was especially sad. I loved how you portrayed Petunia as competitive, and how she missed Lily. Honestly, words can't even express how amazing this is.