|Reviews for An Unexpected Turn Of Events|
| Edana1009 10/9/11 . chapter 1
First, you should have put the summary where it was supposed to go. I usually never look at stories that don't have summaries, but I went ahead this time because there are so few of these crossovers. That being said, when I read your summary it tells me WAY too much of the story. What makes a person continue reading a story is the anticipation of what will happen next. You gave away everything. You even said they would defeat the bad guy and that Naruto would stay in Alageasia. Yes, the good guys do always win, but by stating it right off the bat, it took away all possible excitement in your story before even reading it. You need conflict to make a story progress and by telling us straight out what would happen, there is no conflict. Even though you will write the story and have all the proper elements since I already know whats going to happen I have very little reason to keep reading. It's like flipping to the end of a book to see what happens without actually reading it.
A summary is just a little tidbit of information that is intriguing and informative enough to get someone to read your story, not a plot outline.
I do like your story idea and you first chapter is good but you need more details to make it believable and to build emotion.
Good job and Happy Writing!
PS: I'll still read your story despite knowing what happens already. Can't wait for the next chapter!
| Blinkdawg15 9/13/11 . chapter 1
S'all right. Its not anything amazing. Yet! Keep it goin'. You should read some fanfics, and switch your style up a bit. Your writing style is.. akward. Wait.. did I spell that right? How the heck d'you spell 'Akward' Is it awkward? Or Akward? Or what...? Wait.. off track. Anyways, later,
| ryanshadow19 9/7/11 . chapter 1
a good first chaper i love a good naruto as a dragon rider fanfic