You reviewed my story so I shall review yours.

Awesome. Very well written and Santiago is as militant as she is ingame. This is one of the best shortfics I have read in a long time. And when santiago steps out of the pod and looks around it really captured what I always feel when I play SMAC/SMAX, Awestruck. Good job and keep writing.

- With dearest regards,

Daval Prestor

I can see here that you also have historically-oriented interests in mind. I like that. The chapter could use some shaping up, but you seem to have canonical character down pretty well. There do not seem to be any errors in the syntax, grammar, or spelling.

I will, however, go at some length to describe the 'pivotal moments of history'; particularly, your usage of this moment as a pivotal moment in history because what you've posed in your story is something of a contradiction. Pivotal moments are exactly what they sound like, moments which are integral to understanding the change from one period to the next. However, your character points out that Terrans, as opposed to Chirotes-or Earthlings and people from Chiron, will most likely destroy themselves; that that is mankind's essence. If you can believe it, historical studies today still debate back and forth whether pivotal moments exist in history or things simply stay the same under different guises. Take for example, ask someone of their thoughts on the Black Death; it killed anywhere from 30-60% of the European population in the course of two years. Most people see this, and they make an argument that society is fundamentally changed by these things.