Alright, you can write. That's a rarity around here.
But having the whole first chapter of a fanfic built around an OC? That's even rarer. You're either really smart or really stupid. It seems like you're writing as though this is an actual sequel, and sequels usually begin with recap. Fanfics normally assume the reader knows the source material. And that title! Can you be unpretentious and in someone's face at the same time? If you're going to name it that, you better deliver what you're (implicitly) promising.

no words for that just... amazing

Holy sh-! How could he...? Why...? I don't know what to say. This is so tragic, so sudden, so unbelievable, but somehow so right. Owen is a genius. He finally figured it out! Wow! It is amazing to see how Alvirez and Owen have dug and dug and seemed to figure out Abby. But only Owen loves her this much! I was amazed at his stupid arrogance earlier in the chapter when he insists that with enough time he can definitely make her whole. How arrogant of him to think! Then it all turns upside down in a moment and he sees, really sees, Abby for the first time. This is so sad and awful, but so wonderfully written. I can look back and see how you neatly stacked up failure after failure of Owen's in his attempts to "fix" Abby. It is in the face of her peace when he finally gives her what she wants that the reader see SO clearly how he literally tried everything, chapter after chapter of it, and nothing worked but this. This tragic salvation he's given her! Wow!

Wonderful and horrible at the same time. Amazing that Owen is like Jesus Christ to Abby - he gave to her what she couldn't ask for, earn, or deserve - hope and peace. I agree w/ Alvirez that Abby would have wanted Owen to continue to live and that she wanted to die to save all those she would have killed had she lived. Very thought provoking, sad, wonderful, horrible, realistic. My hat's off to you.

When I began reading this story I wasn't really sure what to expect, but after a couple of paragraphs in, I was hooked. The plot, the writing, characterization, character development, literally EVERYTHING is perfect (Of course that is always subjective) This story is beyond amazing. I am having trouble trying to come up with words to accurately describe what I'm feeling and thinking and I truly believe that they don't exist. Truth is, I really hate it when a main character dies, I guess I still possess that naivety (hopefulness?) that a HEA can be the only right option. I am a romantic after all.

But then, even after realizing in the middle of the story that it is likely that you were going to kill Abby off, I couldn't stop - because this story is just /too/ beautiful. It still is, despite Owen having to kill Abby. By the end of the story, I realized that I just didn't have a particular kind of thinking... That if Abby truly did crave the peace she could only find in her demise, then it /is/ a happy ending... Of course Owen has no way of knowing what it really is, and the audience doesn't either... And that's beauty of it. This is probably the first story that made me see how powerful LOVE truly is. I can't even comprehend that amount of love, much less imagine ever feeling that way. As mesmerized as I am with the idea of it, I'm not sure I want it. Mostly because I'm selfish, but I wouldn't know since I've never felt that way before. Which makes my current opinion moot because how can I form an informed opinion on something I'm ignorant about? Your story has made me 20(x) more introspective. (insert semi-serious deadpan here) Thanks :P

Also, I just want to mention that I have been so convinced that reading and writing is what I want to do with the rest of my life, and nothing else would make me happier... But after this, I'm seriously going to consider psychology. I have always had the thirst for knowledge. When I see things that are unknown and that interest me there is a mental juggernaut that drives me to find out. Thank God for Google. Anyway, Alvirez has just opened so many gates for me, you don't even know... Wonderful character by the way. All of them are.

I have so much more to say, but too many thoughts are going through my mind, and it's currently 3:20am where I'm from which is probably causing me to have some really disjointed thoughts. By the time you get this, there may or may not be stuff here that might not make sense. So I apologize in advance for that.

Your words are somehow ethereal in the darkest ways... They invoke emotions and thoughts that I never even thought I had, wanted, needed. You are an *amazing* author. I put asterisks around the word "amazing" because that is merely a placeholder for the non-existent word/s I was talking about. Please, please keep writing because I don't know if you know it but you're changing lives or at least planting some effing important seeds in people's minds. And I think that is an incredibly powerful gift.

Hope for what? Hope in what? Another amazing, fascinating, excellent chapter. Owen and Alvirez are so smart and Abby is so mysteriously wonderful. This is great! Looking forward to more.

Wow! This is so exciting and interesting! I'm really glad Alvirez didn't die! Now, what does Abby want?

I am relieved that Alvirez is alive, jerk though he is. It is exciting to see so much of Alvirez's training clicking in Owen's mind as he evaluates new information. He is so smart! But, as he evaluates and analyses, it seems more and more obvious that there is no solution for Abby and Owen. I keep hoping you'll pull out some amazing, never before thought of solution for them, but it seems clear - there is no solution.

Wonderful! You continue to impress me with Owen as a realistic character. Yes, he's very smart, but he's still only a child. You do such a good job of making me believe that Owen's just a kid who's in way over his head. But I can't help but love his youthful insistence that it is possible to save Abby from her predicament. He loves her so much. That is what is so unusual about him - what 13 or 14 year old boy has ever cared about someone other than himself to this extent? He is no ordinary boy.
I still think Alvirez is a selfish jerk, but a genius and someone as motivated as Owen. They make a great pair, albeit grudgingly.

Type your review for this chapter here...

Alright, no soundtrack additions? There have to be some country crossovers that Owen can tolerate. He's already got Bonnie Tyler. Juice Newton? Work with me here.
Like the details of what's being stolen. So thirteen.
Are there really any desolate spaces east of the Rockies? Finding it a bit hard to believe
A list of topics Abby won't discuss? That's mature for thirteen
Buppies, that's classic old school
Still have trouble picturing them making out, hard to think of Owen as older and more mature than the movie
Wierd that she won't ever talk about the future, she needs to get over it and adapt
For most boys the million dollar question is will you have sex with me. For Owe it's will you make me a vampire. Abby's response: have sex with me. That's a messed up relationship.
Like how Owen's been making a list of ways to get blood; too bad it had to come out that way
Why isn't it ever enough? I suppose eating her own mother is one reason. Makes sense given how Virginia behaved in the hospital
Starting to get this feeling that Owen is screwed

In all his growth and changes, I have to keep reminding myself that Owen is only 13. I keep wanting to scream, "Don't you see that the reason she's so sad is b/c she's a vampire?" There's nothing he can do to change that, so there's nothing he can do to make her happy. At least he finally understands when she shows him how she killed her own mother. How horrifying. How horrifying. The monster must die. But how and save Abby?

I love the Journey song and the movie references. Clearly you're a child of the 80s, eh? Owen has grown up in a lot of ways in juvie, but it's wonderful to see that he's still just a normal 13 year old boy with giddy nerves over the girl he likes. Weird and sweet and sad all all once. Can't wait to read more. This was such a wonderful first look at their life on the run together.

Well I know I'm a little late on this whole thing but I must say, fantastic job. I just recently saw the movie, yes I know I'm behind and I both understand and respect your ending. Letting them share the same fate is romantic to those who don't see the life ahead of the two main characters. I will admit it brought me to tears and and made me smile at the same time. Fantastic job.
10/10

Alvirez is so interesting and smart. And Owen too! Cool to see the wimp get smart and fill himself with knowledge and plans. I almost feel sorry for Alvirez but how can I when he left Owen in that hell hole to be raped again and again. Now we'll see if Owen is smart enough to help Abby.