Awesome. It's like I'm reading Kubo's work in words. These weird plot elements that you add in perfectly fit Kubo's style of pulling things out of his ass whenever he can. Keep writing, and I hope you update soon!

Great cliff-hanger, nice to see Elwood gain some stature, and it looks like wearing the ring will make him quite the trump card. Wolfina's thoughts are hilarious, her conversations witty and spot-on. Nice work.

Haha! The dialogue in this chapter is fantastic, especially the ending; Wolfina is great. Some nice depth you've got going with the characters, I love that Iroppoi is the older sister.
Some of the lines insinuate something else, but that's so Kubo, really nice work.

You might want to watch your tense swapping.
Original: Wolfina was enjoying a cup while overlooking today's newspaper.
Edit: Wolfina was enjoying a cup while overlooking the day's newspaper.

Most of it is written in past tense, and keeping the same tense makes it easier to read.

I like the introduction to this group, nice use of poker. This 'verse would be filled with games like these, it fits right in. Your characterisation is great, it reads naturally, and it's easy to see these characters in one's mind while reading. Breaking the fourth wall is fun, too, but do so sparingly. I think Kubo broke up time rather than the fourth wall in the panels to have his cast read better to the audience, but it was done only once or twice in the whole story, to the best of my recollection. ...That kind of thing is harder to get away with in fiction, since it's not a visual medium.

Nice work overall. Very entertaining and the crude humour is perfect.

Your characterisation is good; true to the manga. Having Elwood with the ring at the end is interesting premise, no doubt something Kubo might've done.

This has a lot of potential, nice start, brilliant cliffhanger!

LET ME LOVE YOU! i need more, update soon please!

0.o' ooooookkkkkkkk
this is crack that i need to live. please wright more!

I... I love you. ;u;
This is amazing.

Awesome! Please update soon!

*laughs* More fourthwalling, excellent.

Ugh, I have to make another read through of this series, Ol' Kubo sure is gaudy on the names.

Why the cliffhanger? ! And with Wolfina no less! Hurry and update again!

Good god the back and forth fourth walling sounded EXACTLY like old Kubo's style. Old Kubo, not Troll!Kubo, mind you. You have this down to a T. Maybe you SHOULD take the helm. Just saying.

Keep up the great work.

Really good. There should be more storys on Zombie-Powder like that!

Its great to see that someone had the initiative to pick this up from where it left off. Someone had to do it, no?

Excellently in character. I have nothing negative speak of. Everything's very well done.

Hoping to see more of this in the future.