Hey! Ok so this story is really good! I loved it, but could you devide it into more clear paragraphs? The really long paragraphs make it hard to follow unless people use their finger to guide them along the sentences.

This story is ok, but I'd suggest a Beta. One that'll make the story more appealing to the eye. Other than that, I like where this is going.

Aww... the poor, poor Guardian of Metal. The man's such a sweetheart and still horrible things happen to him, both in your fics and in mine. I don't know about you, but that just makes me want to hug him even more.