great 2nd part, aardom!

Looks down at Heather William's reveiw. and appears next 2 him/her and says BYDW, continue the story! make the crayak narrate something.

Well, I can't say it's bad, but I can't say it's thrilling me either. Your beginings seem to be rather slow, and that effect is incremented by the breaks between chapters. I need to see the main core of this fic to state my opinion, so please, get into it quickly. BTW if someone like heather williams reads this, you can say you dislike a fic without being so rude and ill-mannered, such a review doesn't deserve being noticed!

that sucks so much my sister could do better loser and other readers no offense but if you liked this story you are a hidios putrid tube of lard who probably coudnt spell your name if you wanted to. disease looking pimps lump of lards

This is getting even moe interesting. Good job!

Coolish.

It's spelled 'immense'. Don't you have a spellchecker on your computer? If you do, use it. If you don't, get one. Good story. You might want to piece these parts together to make longer posts. Smaller parts are more easily confused, and the breaks between them hurts the continuality.