|Reviews for Uncertain Future|
| Guest 8/14/12 . chapter 13
i love this! hope you update it soon
| Guest 7/16/12 . chapter 13
this story is reall good hope you update soon
| Jester 2/6/12 . chapter 12
Heartbreaking and heartwarming.
Here's hoping Yukiho gets better
| zecross 1/30/12 . chapter 12
...what a sad story... and i really wonder how the producer can be so...cruel?
anyway update soon
| Nao 1/27/12 . chapter 11
All of this suffering ;_;
You're pulling it all together really well. While I love seeing the characters happy, seeing how they react to darker situations is... refreshing, I guess.
Good work as always. (Also I don't think you could've picked a better title for this one. It fits really well)
| The Green Mage 1/18/12 . chapter 11
You had a few spelling errors here or there, and your grammar seems to flip flop here and there where you miss vital parts of sentences. Take the first paragraph: "It got to the point that began stressing out the idols as well". I don't know what or who is stressing out over the idols.
It may just be a style thing, but I prefer more personalized... words... "a workout" is less preferable to "their workout" because you specified that it was a couple of them. So it was after their workout, if you know what I'm saying.
Also, as a grammatical rule, a question mark can remain inside a quotation mark without 'ending' the sentence. So "Am I alive," he asked, should be "Am I alive?" he asked. But wait, I think I misread that. That was a statement you put there, not a question. I just took it as a question.
I believe that's an improper use of the dash in Yukiho's line. "-he said that-" doesn't fit the usual rules of being for emphasis or explanation. It would have been more filled with style to use an anaphora with 'He said that, he claimed that..." etc.
You also make the same mistake I do with tenses. You're going from passive to active, and I'm pretty sure that isn't allowed or tolerated, maybe. I barely remember, it's dancing on the edge of my mind. Specifically:
Chihaya got up, shouting, "Get a hold of yourself!"
I think you can fix it by adding a while after the comma, maybe it's just me.
While this is entirely a personal thing, I think, and remember, that this is just my opinion, that you need to be a tad more detailed. At:
"...No. I didn't get that," Iori brushed some hair back with her arm.
You can add more detail; how does Iori brushed her hair back? There's a fine line from purple prose and a nice amount of detail, and you're pretty far away from that line.
Like I said earlier with the anaphora earlier, you could easily have done this with the first paragraph after August 30, Year 2.
"Without the producer and Haruka... Without someone to officially... Without [I don't know, some reason or another] everyone knew their career was in a bad position."
It's still very engaging, though, I enjoyed reading it. Thank you for giving me that privilege. Love ya, Urbs. :)
| Jester 1/14/12 . chapter 10
Not being able to confine in many people and losing someone you consider a friend must be hard..
Wonder how Chihaya will cope with this
| The Green Mage 1/13/12 . chapter 10
I've got to say, you've improved immensely since the last time I've had the pleasure of reading your stories.
You've become much more descriptive in your writings, keep the fourth wall intact and don't flip and flop around from place the place. You seem to be keeping everything in Chihaya's perspective, and that's fine, not jumping from person to person (I had that problem quite a lot). Glad to see you're writing again.
| zecross 1/13/12 . chapter 10
hum..why azusa leave... and who the her destiny person is?
and...good work, update soon
| Jester 1/8/12 . chapter 9
Lol hard at Makoto's molestation and the twins eagerness.
The bad thing is I actually see this happening.
Too bad Azusa is leaving I wanted to know she liked.
Haruka left and now there's a new person at 765pro I have a bad feeling
| Nao 1/6/12 . chapter 9
Awh, Haruka. ;_;
Everything you write just seems so possible, and that's what I like the most, I guess. You capture the idol business really well - how it isn't always completely perfect like the series tends to make it seem. I'm really impressed, actually.
Looking forward to the next update (...and finding out who Azusa likes, when the time comes. Ahaha) Keep up the good work
| Jester 12/24/11 . chapter 8
This was a peaceful chapter.
I think Lunatic Dreamers is a cool name kinda reminds me of the song Lunatic Tears.
I hope Chihaya becomes more friendly she's one of my favorites and I don't like seeing her sad.
| zecross 12/23/11 . chapter 8
yeah.. you're right.. maybe im too pushy..
well its not like i will really complain if urby make it yuri pairing
how the story goes its up to urby... will i read it or not its up to me
| zecross 12/23/11 . chapter 8
ugh.. sorry.. if my review look weird...
looks like theres a bug in my phone...that cause it
| zecross 12/23/11 . chapter 8
,hum hum... so this chapter shift to makoto group... and maybe mainly abou azusa... seriously.. i really wonder who she like...
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