|Reviews for Herdman Christmas Carol|
| Yemi Hikari 4/4/13 . chapter 1
Your writing is rather choppy. You have quite a few run-on sentences in your first paragraph and you don't spell out numbers. You also wrote the list in a manner people don't write lists in, not to mention it is bold. You could very well learn to hold down shift when you hit the enter key on lists like that. A lot of your sentences are short and there is no feeling or emotion to your writing, not to mention their is a lack of "show, don't tell". One thing you have going for you is you do have an interesting idea.
| Merlinfanatic77 12/3/12 . chapter 1
Please continue this! :) I'm Alice in the Best Christmas Pageant ever for a play I'm in. :P MF