This has an excellent summary and some great lines... I particularly enjoyed the aside about "the snap." The beginning, I thought, tells a little rather than shows, and if it were mine I'd consider throwing in a few longer paragraphs here and there to offset the short, snappy ones a little better. Still, very well written, enjoyed this x

OHHHHH SNAP XD Nice ending! Love how ya included Ochiais reaction as well! Cx But...what if he saw them kiss?! :O Dun dun duuunn! Ah well, this is going in mah favourites!

*reads ending* ... *squee*

Kyaaaaaa!
*blushing

I really really love it!
Well, actually I get confused at first, but you ended it so well..
*it just me, anyway

So, I gonna put this on my fave list..
See ya!

Gah, so cute. That basically sums this couple up xD

that was cute lol

Aww! So cute! :)

So adorable. Nice concept.

It took all my willpower to not scream like a fangirl right there. Eeeheehee!

That was great. I didn't explode, but I did get a cavity from the fluff. It made me laugh and feel all warm and fuzzy inside.