Okay, so Vera had a crush on Jayne when she was younger and is now a hardened woman. I wonder if she’s hardened because of she’s had to deal with things emotionally (i.e. Jayne leaving, her brother) or her mannerisms seem very soldier-like (was she in a war?) or a combination of both. I’d like to see Vera open up a little, if not to Jayne then to at least Kaylee (I mean who in the verse could not like Kaylee?).

I hope it takes at least a little while before Vera and Jayne get together because it seems she was really hurt by his leaving and it would take her some time to heal and realize, A. he’s not dead and B. he could care for her…if he lets himself.

Now we get to see Victor. I’m a little relieved because at first, I thought he would be another love interest for Vera. I’m trying to figure out, in the present timeline, how old are Vera and Jayne? Anyways, I really like your use of words and the imagery it comes to mind. Especially the little things that may slip past you but upon reading closely, it’s really funny.

“Strong grip,” Mal commented with a nod as Zoe let go of the boy’s sooty palm and artfully brushed the filthy residue from her hand onto Mal’s back.

Great job, I look forward to reading more.

I like Vera. She seems no-nonsense and willing to do whatever it takes. She shot Henry without a blink of an eye. At first I didn't see how she could shoot her own person, even if Jayne was in trouble, but now I see she was really doing justice for Henry's abused wife.

I'm interested to hear who Victor is because Vera seemed to become quickly tense and didn't want him involved.

And bad Jayne for saying he's had better than little Vera. I'm sure he was using it as a coping mechanism but still. And Vera could never be a companion after spending all her time as being just one of the guys.

Great read, look forward to reading more.

I found myself getting really excited at the prospect of seeing Jayne reunited with his past. I find it hard to fathom Jayne young because all I can think of is a huge man who isn’t afraid of anything (except Reavers which is completely justified) and is so sure of himself. Interested to see what happens between Vera and Jayne now that she thought he’s been dead all this time.

Interesting...the story keeps pulling you in the farther you read. I like the comment Jayne said about lookin' pretty doin' stuff or standin' around, because that is very true! I hope we get to meet Vera soon, I like that you're giving only snippets here and there, it adds to the mystery.

The only suggestion is to have somewhere on the page translations from Chinese/Mandarin, only because I'm too lazy to look it up myself.

Great chapter!

Sorry it took me awhile to get around reading your story. Seems like a good start, I'm interested in hearing more about Vera and maybe a little back story on Jayne. Sounds like Vera could give Jayne a run for his money. I look forward to hearing more.

Oh my. An unexpected twist at the end. I really liked how you introduced River on the scene, with the alpaca, and Victor interpreting River's words as relating to the alpaca. I'm noting Bing's remark to Jayne - "Don't give Coop a reason to hate on you." I also liked Mal's thoughts about young people, especially his acknowledgement that he was once that way himself. Also, Wash's eagerness to talk piloting was so refreshingly Wash-like, it just made me smile. Don't wait so long before posting the next chapter!

This is good. Really good. Not only is the plot shaping up to be something brilliant but the characterisations are bang on too. Great idea about Vera, I can't wait to see where she goes.

You're good at making charactors that are engaging. I only read stories where River's wits are still touched, otherwise I get bored because "A completely coherant River means writers don't deliver" KatTaya, she turns into a Mary Sue if she's stable. Just lettin ya know. I think its funny that they call Jayne Clydesdale.

Riona

You continue to transition effectively between past and present, a valuable skill as a writer. How do they get the elpakas to just lay still? I liked Mal's "Some men aren't meant to be tethered to the ground". and I smiled at "Are you you drinking Kaylee. Of course not Captain, she hickupped."

Riona

"Now you gone done confused Clydesdale," howled Berkes.

Naw, that made me laugh. I'm a horse person, I love clydies. My friend has a gorgeous purebred and he does have the sweetest confused expression 3

Good chapter. Liked the flashback scene with Mikas and Jayne wondering if BIng assinged them llama-shearing duty as a form of punishment. Mal's bold question and the response: "That weren't no simple question...and certainly not one you should be askin' me." - good exchange, and you're certainly keeping up the mystery and the tantalizing hints! Like the touches of humor: "can't imagine why anyone would choose to step foot on a Drift Master, let alone spend a week." and Kaylee's comment about Jayne and his big gun.

I love the whole scene of card playing, from the assured and cocky "the name of the game my friends ..." to the rhythmic zip of the cards, you are a paramountly good writer. Your ability to write well is further enhanced by that scene with Jayne and Vera getting going, I sure hope she's lying about having someone, because I don't like cheating, the scene will be much more satisfying if she's available free and clear for the giving and the taking. I love that she smells like "honeysuckle and black powder" the perfect woman for Jayne, plus you never forget your first real love.

Riona

Past and present. Clearly some spark and fire between Jayne and Vera at both points, as the story begins to be revealed. I do believe Vera is not lying when she says she's got someone in her life now. And I think we'll find out more about him soon. Chuantao Stud sounds waaaay more complicated than I could follow; no wonder Jayne was looking dumb as a drafthorse. Bing's got quite the temper. Good chapter.

Sigh. As much as Jayne and Vera both willed themselves to put their relationship in the past, clearly there's still a lot of interest there, even if Vera does have "someone who depends on her"...

I know I'm jumping to conclusions, but I do wonder, regardless of whether this moment of passion is a new beginning or whether they're interrupted, just how Jayne is going to react to learning about Victor. Does he blame Bing for running him off, or Mikas for not letting him know, or Vera for not trying to follow him know somehow, or himself, for not coming back for Vera after he killed Coop? It's interesting to think about everyone's responsibilities here. From your flashback, we know just how brutal a parent Bing was. Given his iron rule, I can forgive both Mikas and Vera for not doing more than they did. Plus, we know that Vera didn't know the whole truth about Jayne's departure. I assume Mikas did, but he probably was a big part of the reason Vera survived her father's outrage when he discovered that his daughter was pregnant. Plus, he seems genuinely fond of Victor, and no doubt acted as a surrogate father to his nephew, and Mikas even acknowledged when "Clydesdale" first reappeared that he thought Jayne treated Vera pretty well while he was there. Bing's gone, so there's not much point in harboring a lot of resentment there. But ultimately, even with their obvious sexual attraction, will there be lingering hurt on both sides because of their acceptance of Bing's rule? I guess time will tell.

I really do love this story. Each chapter is so beautifully and compellingly written. I can't wait to find out more about how Jayne and Vera's relationship developed, in spite of Bing's autocracy, as well as to see if any kind of future is possible given everything that's happened in the intervening 17 years. Jayne and Vera are both fighters, so it's hard to imagine that they'll just settle into their old lives after hired guns threatening Mikas are (hopefully!) dispatched. And yet I'm not sure that I'd want Jayne to leave his surrogate family on Serenity, nor Vera hers, given how hard she's worked to protect them. Definitely very complicated times ahead, I fear...

Thanks for the wonderful update. Please keep them coming (and you can take that any way you want! ;-)