cool! this is very high quality!

Oh poor poor Jatfast! he does lead himself up to trouble doesn't he!

Loved this chapter so much! It was a funny as you promised!

OMFG! what a cliffhanger! :D it's brilliant!

Still loving it :D Linebreaks are also making it easier if I lose my place so thank you for that.

Sorry! Haven't been on here for awhile.

Anyway, I really love how it's going and hope to see more :D

I love Jeri! There is not enough short tempered characters around. Thanks for updating :D

I wouldn't call it dull, Only really bland things (such as my chapter one before I re did it) with lacking of detail are ever really dull. I just can't get enough of this story.

moar! :-D

now, more useful points:

*I love the way you make the dialog flow and involve the reader into the situation.

*also love the longer underlying plot yet incorporating characters and their stories (very simpsons-esque if you get my meaning... what could be 2 dimensional characters just there for the scene can very easily have the story about them)

suppose only critique i would have is setting the scene at the beginning, but the scene unravels as you read it.. and i really like that fact. So not so much a critic rather than pointing out the style.

I'm rambling. Much love! X

I love where your taking the story! Nice uodate speed too.

My thoughts: I sure as hell would be worried!

My real review: I really love where this story is going. I love your style of writing and how you're playing out the plot. I also like how your defining your characters. I can't wait to see more.

I hate you for leving it like that, it's to evil, I sat there going, "What the hell happens!" I love this chapter as well. I love where you're taking it and again, can't wait to see more c:

Nice. I really like your style of writing, It's hard to stop reading. Do you plan on continueing it? I would love to see more of these characters.