|Reviews for Reunited|
| An alpaca 8/26/12 . chapter 1
Well..the pitch is not bad, but the action is too fast. You should have took your time by describing the decor, Bianca's feelings...
Same for the dialogue : everything happens in a second, with no explications or a little pre-scene. It's like Bianca is totally ready to see Lucas, as if she doesn't attach importance to the time they spent away from each other.
After 5 years Bianca and Lucas probably have other thing than ardor to express...
You can do much better :D !
Ps : sorry for my bad english, if I can perfectly read i've got more problems with the expression u_u
| naera03 7/12/12 . chapter 1
it was awsome :D
| Ellie277 6/1/12 . chapter 1
No offense, but it would help if you improved the grammar and spelling. It would be easier to read and get into. I like the plot and sounds like it will be a great story :)