|Reviews for Intertwined Fates|
| XxDeathStarxX 7/25/12 . chapter 6
Very good chapter!
"She can have the last word," Vince murmured under his breath, wrapping an arm around Jamie's shoulders and kissing her gently. "'Cause I have the girl." The eighteen-year-old felt a blush crawl up on her cheeks as her boyfriend's lips parted from hers.
Aww, that was perfect :)
Little Jamie finally was ready to leave the nest. As terrifying as it sounded, the Flemings still put that into consideration. (Well, Elaine did. Peter was absolutely against it. Of course, he couldn't win the argument if he tried. Elaine would just glare at him until he agreed.)
LOL. Had a good laugh on that one. Poor Peter.
I think that the fifth chapter might be my favorite, but this one and the second one were very close to that.
| IronAmerica 7/23/12 . chapter 6
Awww. This is the last chapter? :(
At least Jamie and Vince are happy together. They sure are lucky that Peter's such a reasonable guy, though. (And that should be "withdraw", not "withdrawal".)
Why hasn't Dominic fed Isabella to the sharks yet? I know he's pretending to be a stand-up guy for the duration of the cruise (and around Dana), but seriously. His patience has got to be pretty thin by now, and I don't think anyone would blame him... (He could spin it as an early wedding present or something and gain two alibis in the process.)
Awww, poor Vince. You're just not used to the fact that your girl is absolutely stinking rich, are you? *laughs at him* I want to know what Chess was saying! (Although I do have some ideas there...)
That's actually a decent plan, all things considered. The ceremony *you* want first, and then the one your parents want to throw because they're crazy and have too much money. *laughs at Jamie* Also,“bullied himself into being the best man” should read “bullied his way into being best man”, otherwise it sounds like Dominic is bullying himself, which is weird. Even for Scales.
If it were normal, I'd be worried. Of course, there's also the pregnancy... Come on, Jamie. You know Vince wants a big family. Or a family, but either way. :) It's always nice when these things work out.
One last quibble: “online courses to campus courses”: I thought she was doing campus courses until she got pregnant; unless this is the post-baby transfer…? And that'd be the last of them.
My favorite parts of this story were anything with Scales and Dana. :)
Lovely story overall.
| IronAmerica 7/10/12 . chapter 5
Okay, let's try this again. *sighs* Stupid computers...
Well, sad to say, I've met people like that. Of course, none of them have ever actually resorted to physical violence, so... Poor Vince. *hugs him*
Heh. They're so cute and sappy sweet. :P
I agree with Jamie. Early mornings without coffee should be banned. *shudders* Stupid mornings. And yes, Vince is acting a bit like a cat. Silly Vince.
Heh heh heh... Vince is sweet, but he can never get anything done. Aren't interrupting friends and frenemies awesome? :D
Love the description of their day. However, it's either cinema or theater, not cinema theater. And Vince, I don't think anyone would really mind if Isabella went missing...
Should be "courtesy of" not "courteous of" room service.
How is drunk!Bella different from sober!Bella? *is curious* Heh. Sorry.
Poor Vince. Kneed in the groin. *winces* But yay for Dominic! *cheers wildly* He's amazing.
Sorry about this review not being here earlier. *sighs*
Lovely chapter. There were a few words that could be changed, along with the quibbles I mentioned in the review, but other than that, it was good.
| XxDeathStarxX 7/8/12 . chapter 5
That waking up scene was über cute. Absolutely loved it :) Vince must have a magic touch to make the morning good for a still coffee deprived Jamie. lol
Isabella really did it this time. Could she be any more pathetic? Oh my... It was hilarious to see her make more of a fool out of herself. I didn't know that it was even possible, but a drunk Isabella obviously took the cake.
| XxDeathStarxX 6/16/12 . chapter 4
I don't think that shouting to the person behind the door that you're not awake is the best way to convince him/her of that 'fact'. lol
I really liked the breakfast scene! Isabella is not very good at taking a hint, is she? Haha! Can't wait to see how many times poor Jamie has to shoot her down before she finally understands.
| IronAmerica 6/16/12 . chapter 4
Hey, it's a new chapter! Yay!
Well, as long as she's not allergic to said aftershave... *snickers and runs for cover* I'm going to induce another beating here, but I see a lot of our Skymon RPs popping up in these scenes. :P
Oh Isabella. So blunt, so cheerful... How did Vince and her become friends again?
Yay for Scales! And the rest of the crew. *shrugs*
*sighs* And this is where I start to hate some characters. Why is Vince friends with Isabella if she's this petty all the time? Or such a sore loser? Sheesh. This conflict will most likely end in murder.
At least the guys are smart enough to agree with their ladies. :)
Oh boy. I knew it. Who's going to get chucked overboard for the shnarks, if I might ask?
Didn't spot anything aside from a few missing commas. Otherwise, lovely chapter.
| IronAmerica 6/8/12 . chapter 3
Hey, it's a new chapter! Yay!
It's nice to see that they're trying to take things slowly for now. Although I have a feeling that won't last... *sighs*
*coos* How adorable. I guess Jamie and Vince were at recess or something when they met? (Just going by the age difference, they wouldn't have been in the same class.) Still, cute couple.
Being adorkable saves Vince's bacon every time, doesn't it?
*sighs* Honestly, they do heat the pools on cruise ships. Perhaps she was hoping for cuddles instead?
*snickers* Hooray for the fabulous killjoy!
Nothing to complain about here. Loved the chapter. :)
| XxDeathStarxX 6/8/12 . chapter 3
It seems that Vince and Jamie are very eager to play tonsil-hockey. lol Well, they have quite a bit of catching up to do, and there's no better way to do it.
The way they originally met as children was very cute :) Kind of reminded me of the teddy bear story.
| IronAmerica 5/27/12 . chapter 2
Hey, a new chapter! Cool.
Because Vince is kinda dumb. But we love him anyways. (A coffee IV? Where can *I* get one of those...?) And he's lucky Scales didn't knock him out and shove him in a closet or something.
Oh good lord. Does Vince know that he's basically trying to commit suicide at this point? Sheesh. Wait... Maybe Scales is trying to kill him for some peace and quiet... :D :P
That plot appears in a lot of RomComs somehow... (It's a sweet gesture, but the actual housekeeping staff wouldn't do that without a massive bribe being involved...) Of course, I find it curious that Jamie isn't questioning just why Vince is part of the housekeeping staff... Unless she's unaware that he's a passenger? Hm. :\
His friends were probably clued into Vince's scheme courtesy of Dana and were probably wondering if he'd been arrested or something. And Vince is a sweetie.
How cute. Somehow, I get the feeling that something disastrous is going to happen...
(As a side note, there are more descriptors than "sandy blonde" to describe Vince's hair. Three times in one paragraph is more than a little excessive.)
Aside from that, no major quibbles. Looking forward to more! (And more Dales or Kia/Jacob...)
| XxDeathStarxX 5/25/12 . chapter 2
Very good chapter!
Aww, Vince and Jamie's reunion was so sweet. I especially loved the explosive kiss :)
"The only girl." :) No wonder he couldn't help kissing her like there was no tomorrow!
| IronAmerica 5/21/12 . chapter 1
Hey, it's up!
If Jamie is a Fleming, wouldn't she go to a private school or have tutors instead? And I somehow get the feeling that her mother has something to do with the lack of bodyguards...
:P Oh Jamie, you'll never convince him of that. Now, if you happened to come back from the Bahamas of a boyfriend... *winces* And Jamie, you're the daughter of Peter Fleming. It's inevitable.
Reiterating a point above, wouldn't Jamie have been in private school if she was being homeschooled? And if she was in private school, how would Vince's parents been able to afford tuition? *is curious* Maybe he's smarter than he looks...
Well, I recognize the whole crew...except for Isabella Chase. Hm. Poor Vince. At least he's got friends looking out for him. Erm... Mostly. *snickers* Poor Vince. He's a sweetie, and a blockhead.
Cousins, huh? Cool. :) Oh Dom. You just love threatening him, don't you? *snickers*
Poor Isabella, and Vince. *cracks up* Oh Vince.
Lovely start to the story. You, of course, know which parts I prefer already. :) Didn't spot anything immediately wrong with the writing.
Looking forward to more.
| XxDeathStarxX 5/20/12 . chapter 1
That was a promising start! Can't wait to see Jamie's reaction when she realizes that Vince is in fact on that cruise :)
Loved the interaction between Jamie and her parents. So cute :) "Her father was the worse, by far. He held her so tightly that she thought her vital organs might have been punctured." lol