good

This is cool

"As she lay down for bed, she couldn't help but wonder who would be the first to go."
I loved that.
And I looooove the Tara x Christian.
Is Christian a she-he? Like, a herpophidite? It would actualy explain a lot..

Woahhh that was awesome(: One thing..
"Christian stood across the bar from Tara and quickly caught her eye."
CHRISTIAN'S A CHICK!
THAT SOOO MESSES WITH MY SHIPS...
lol(:
I like how She-he called Tara training bra
I will forever wonder in Christian is a she-he. This is all your fault. Be guilty.
lmfao(;

Please keep writing!

It's great! Please go on!

Please update! I love this story!

this is an awesome start, i love the banter you have going between tara and christian, loved the cliff hanger to, cant wait to see what happens next x)

You said you wanted an honest opinion and evaluation, so I'm giving you one. It was quite good for a start, especially for your first story. I like how you just kinda jump in to the story and it's fast-paced and you just get to the dialogue and action. It's admirable because I think a lot of people like that. But I also think that you should make it a tad bit meatier. You need more detail, maybe make it longer. It's just my opinion that you should get into what they feel too, because if not I think the story just kind of lacks a little something, a flow, maybe the essence of them in general (my crazy OTP fangirling, I apologize). Either way, it seems very promising and your vocabulary is pretty good, grammar too. So just keep on progressing as an author and continue! Oh and I love your version of their flirtiness, like the thing with the changing rooms. GENIUS.