I liked your story. It has made me think a lot when it comes to my own. I certainly am a person who wasn't fond of Upham. However, I'm realizing that there's more to him than meets the eye.

However, I do have a few issues. While I do believe they teased him a lot at first, I don't think they would have been this cruel.

Also I believe that you need to add more detail to your story. It has great possibility, but it needs a little more. This is my own opinion, but maybe you could write it over starting with the extra detail. I would read it again, that's for sure.

E

This was really good! I've read it over and over. I love Upham, i think people should make more stories about him more!