pls upload this soon, it sounds interesting.

This story is really great but i have one suggestion...your story is kinda hard to read so maybe try spacing it out during dialogue and spacing out some of the details. example)

We walked through the swirly thingy 'though I more or less dragged my sister 'when I saw Jason I looked like he was smiling which by the way freaked me out .

Sarah asked "why did you bring us here Jason kitty?"

in all honesty I thought he would have answered, but he didn't he just turn and ran into the street which in turn made Sarah run after him with me running after her . I looked and saw a carriage? Which I gave a what the f*** look, I looked back at my sister when she stopped in the middle of the street holding Jason. I ran out and pushed her out of the way and braced myself for the impact that never came I opened my eyes to see that the carriage had stopped inch form me. From the carriage I heard a voice say,

"Sebastian why have we stopped?"

so basically like this so it's easier to understand, kay?
-sincerely Sacha Michaelis 3

Yay! Cake! *Eats Cake* Finally! Sebby and Ciel are here! This chapter is so awesome!

Great story. Update soon:)

you have potential but i don't understand your story at all! Add mor detail, show more of the plot and most importantly... correct yourself. Because i've seen a lot of ponctuation errors. - no offense intended- love magic 1

Awwww, that's so sad. Their parents died! Why does the good die young! *Eats cookie*

Good so far!

interesting idea _ I can't wait for the next chapter.

I really love this story. A couple things though, make sure you re-read your story because you have some grammar and punctuation mistakes. Other than that your story is perfect!