Certainly not bad for a first one. Clear narrative, calling forth clear mental images of what's happening - nothing wrong with that! So keep at it!

But I agree with the others: you don't need those dividing headers of 'Hogan's point of view' etc. That's clear enough in the story. :-)

The grammar needs to be worked on, but other than that this was a fun short story.

Cute idea. I concur with everyone else on POV. A piece this short needs a single POV. You can convey POV more effectively through style. Reading is the best way to gain an understanding of style. Read all the literature you can lay your hands on and you'll get the hang of it.

(stupid phone!)

...I would stick with one pov per story. Second, brush up on military history. To assault a German officer was punished by a firing squad, not two weeks in the cooler. If writing is your passion then do not let anyone discourage you. Follow your dreams.

Congrats on posting your first story! As Jinzle says, we don't flame here. We do like proper punctuation and grammar, though, so you could look over your story and try to spot places that need correction (for example, 'Colonel Hogan lied down on his bunk' should be 'Colonel Hogan lay down on his bunk').

And regarding POV: I usually don't need prompts to let me know what the POV is; I can tell from the context, as long as different POVs aren't jumbled into the same paragraph, and you've kept yours separate here.

As far as kicking Kolear (maybe it's supposed to be Kohler?): HH writers weren't all that up on military history either; I remember a scene where LeBeau deliberately kicks Schultz in the shins in order to get himself into the cooler. However, any prisoner going out of the barracks and approaching a guard like that at night would most likely have been shot before he got the chance to kick!

Last but not least: don't preface your story with an apology! It's distracting, and you don't do yourself justice. This was a fun story, and I can certainly understand poor Hogan being driven to such drastic action. Keep writing!

Clever little snapshot-and a creative way to escape from the ever-bumbling, ever-pompous Crittendon. Hope you'll write moore in the future

First of all congratulations on tor first fiction. It takes courage to post for the first time. Secondly we do not flame here. We have all been first time writers and remember how that felt like.

As your story, it was a very amusing little tale. It made mw smile reading it but you do not have to indicate a change of pov. Until you become a stronger writer, I would stick to just one pov. S