Good work in being able to put your words down on paper and convey your ideas in an understandable manner. I would put this at a grade 11 level of quality in story telling. Try reading as many different authors as possible to get a sense of the different writing styles out there. You are not just having a conversation with yourself you are painting a picture with words.

Its good u should finish it

wait thats it? what about the rest?

you wrote
She was the kind hearted person I've ever known
did you mean to put most?

other then that it was great!

Love it! Keep going! I want more! Lol :)

ooooooh me likey! i want to know what happened to his dad! PLEASE continue