This sounds good

Brilliant. Just brilliant. And dark and slightly spooky too, which is always good.
Vimes and Vetinari are both done very well, and you've got Colon spot on. More of the Watch characters, please! Include Nobby!
And never apologise for your stories being dark. Dark is awesome.

Enthralling. Please continue. I find the style suits the narrative and the characterizations spot-on

Dark indeed! Which is not always a bad thing, of course. I am quite curious as to what The Patrician knows. He is always a fun character to play around with as well. Anyway, good job and I hope to read more soon :)

hmm... now I'm really curious what the merchant's guild has to do with this but I don't think they're really behind it, this seems very /personal/.

I really enjoyed this story, it would be nice if there was more but even this is enough to make me read more of your stuff.

brr... please hurry up and post more because I can't [i]wait[/i] for the epic beat down Vimes is gunna give these creeps!

And now that everyone knows she's gone, they will wish they hadn't. Vimes is going to personally tear this city apart looking for her! I was kind of wondering why he was so hesitant. Something this big wouldn't stay secret for long in a place where rumors spread so quickly.

Great story. It's nice to see how helplessness effects him. It reminds me of how he acted when Young Sam was born.

needs a bit of proofreading

-Vimes glared at him, but widely chose not to comment.
-"I should get back to...to...to the resport, yeah, the report..." His questing hand found the doorknob behind hind him.

I'm getting more nervous and anxious after every update. Sam really is going to go mental, but poor Sybil though, that guy is a horrible scary creep.

Hmmm. Pretty solid. The writing seems fit, the characters seem to click in place pretty well, and you achieve the overall tone pretty well. The kidnappers give the story a gruesome tone. Maybe a bit TOO gruesome. The neck licking was just too much in my opinion.

The level of writing is well as well. Good grammar, and the words used aren't sloppy and simplistic.

Also the bit with vimes wanting Sybil is unnecessary. Use subtle hints. No need to say it out loud. It works better.

Overall good job on chapters 1-4.

dun-dun-DUN! Totally hooked on this now. But nobles have some nerve asking 'where's the watch'? Next there'll be an editorial about how many more resources were used to solve this kidnapping compared with others...
Can't wait til the next installment.

Make de Worde suffer, please.

Better yet, make Vimes and Carrot have words with him together.

Vimes is already panicking about whether his wife is still alive! There's no need to make things worse by splashing it over the front page and reminding him that he can't do anything without more information.

you have my attention. Please, please, post another chapter soon, I'm desperate to know what's going on.

they hurt Sybil! That is not good, not good at all, Sam's going to go mental, and I'm getting nervous! ;)

great update, I really loved the "confrontation" between Sam and Vetinari. I like that he gives Sam carte blanche, just hoping he won't regret it later...