At the end, we're reminded just how physical Faye has been throughout the story. Whether it's aggression, confusion, passion, or sadness, she relies on physical outlets for expression. When she needs comfort, all Ana can do is hug her. When trying to break up with Spike, she literally tries to break him and herself in the rape scene. When she has to make a choice, a true, emotional choice, she backs away and reacts physically. She can't face her own feelings, and she can't let go of the past, so her body takes over, and the arousal is the only reaction she knows to act upon. Since she's too conflicted to realize that perhaps her past means more to her than her future, she is paralyzed in emotional turmoil and so her inappropriate reaction is the only way she can address this crux. What's convenient is that she doesn't have to make decision by acting on it physically. It saves her, as it always has, from true emotional investment in something.

That being said, the first scene was inconsistent and problematic. This was a crucial point--our last and main interaction between Bea and Faye. Of course, Bea comforts Faye physically and Faye reacts to the rejection of Ezekiel with nausea, which fit the tone and characterization of the story, but the dialogue doesn't support it. Bea, who is supposed to make Faye face her emotions without resorting to her same somatic coping methods, doesn't really come close to accomplishing it. The dialogue tells us nothing new. In some parts, Bea seems to repeat herself. We know Ezekiel's pain. We know he's faking, and this is not a moment of dramatic irony, so Faye, on some level, knows too. What we needed from Bea, and this dialogue, was insight into Faye's crux. We needed her wisdom and her liminal (meaning both outside and inside--she's somewhere in between being involved in the Faye/Ezekiel situation and completely outside of it as Faye herself points out) perspective, so that it would not make Faye and Ezekiel's kiss so similar to previous interactions. It needed to be new.

I don't at all mean to sound too critical. I truly do love this story, and I think the chapter's strengths have to lie within the context of the entire 102 chapters that precede it. Unlike some of your best chapters, it can't stand on its own. I'm pretty sure that you know that and expected that.

Jet and Ana, who provide continuation and often a fresh perspective, can't be relied on at this point. Your audience needs to feel her conflict like she feels it. You need to remind us why Ezekiel matters, and why Spike might not be enough.

Maybe the fact that I have Stars' "Your ex-lover is dead" is affecting my read of this chapter. When Faye was angry about Ezekiel's pettiness, I wanted to see it and believe it because that was a genuine feeling within her at that moment, even if later on we would find out it was a ruse.

Sorry for the essay-length review. You've certainly got a lot people committed and invested in these characters, and that's a powerful thing.

I'm thrilled to see an update!

Honestly, I'm somewhat confused on the timeline...particularly when the Spike/Faye/Book scene and funeral scenes took place compared to the Ezekiel scenes. But I don't think it really matters, since it feels like a mood and tonal issue at this point.

I'm excited for more, always. But I frowned at the kissing again at the end--it feels like Ezekiel and Faye keep making the same mistake, often just half an hour after the last mistake. I'm confused as to what the point is any more, and I can't tell where you're trying to go with both their characters. It seems like the story won't move forward until they separate, but every scene together is a year in which they make out, fight, then make out again, then fight again. Whether Faye wants Spike or Ezekiel doesn't seem to matter any more as much as her choosing someone and then acting on her decisions. She hasn't done that in a long time.

I was glad to see Jet and Ana back! I've been wondering for a while what happened to the movie and murder plot, and Roscoe. I hope we get more of that in future chapters.

Keep going strong, I'm looking forward to the next one! =)

Oh my goodness, it's been forever! I was ecstatic when I found the time to sit down and read this chapter! I may have forgotten a few things that happened in this story, but every once in a while, I find myself thinking about it, remembering your new characters like Beatrice, Ezekiel and Ana, and wondering when I'll g et to read more. Thank you so much for updating! I love how you write, and I love this story, ever since I started reading it forever ago. You are awesome, and you left us with a cliff hanger! Argh! Don't leave us hanging for too long! Keep 'em coming!

<3
Purple Pirate Lex ^_^

we're still here so don't worry. take your time. we'll wait for your updates regardless of how long it'll take because i've been floating around this site for the last 4 years and honestly your up there with the best of them.
thanks for updating.

OH MY LORD! Thank goodness you haven't given up on this.

How I have missed thee. You make me want to write SpikexFaye again.

*goes off the update Red Light*

Hi, I just wanted to poke my head in and say thank you for writing this. It looks like it may be abandoned - and after 100plus chapters I can see where you might have just gotten a little tired or burnt out.

I also want you to know that I enjoyed it, regardless of the structural issues, and I'm glad you went as far with it as you did. This piece helped give me closure after a recent rewatch of the series, when I got way too wound up over the ending.

It was interesting seeing you develop Faye and Spike as people when they were both forced live life and "carry that weight" so to speak. I was really angry at the end of the series that Faye's story was never given equal weight, so your elaboration made me very pleased. I'm glad Jet is happy here, too(even if I kept waiting for Ana to betray them).

Also, I love your musical taste, and the songs you scattered throughout the fic. It warms my heart to know there's another girl out there who's actually heard of the Super Furry Animals.

So hey, if you're still alive and kicking, I hope you're still writing on something somewhere, and that you know your work is still being enjoyed.

Oh dear god. I love you. Seriously! This story is FANTASTIC!

I really like Ezekiel, but damn, sometimes I really wish Faye would move on and hook up with le Spike. There are many instances where I feel so sorry for Spike, and I can actually identify with his pain and suffering. One of the other things I love about your authoring skills is how the reader can clearly see the progression of his character throughout this fic. 'Tis brilliant! *Sigh* All your scenes are so gut-wrenching...and I can't help but get emotional. This has been one hell of a roller-coaster, but I'm enjoying every moment of it :D

I can only hope that Spike and Faye will get the happy ending they deserve. Lord knows how much I love them as a couple.

I'll be looking forward to your next chapter!

I love love love your stories and I hope you keep up the great work you are doing.

Your writing is really amazing-- the emotions you capture make for a heart wrenching read at times, but only in the way an excellent writer can make their readers feel when telling a story! I look forward to your updates : )

Nice one I like it. It's heating up I'm going to go read more

I likebhe idea of this story and the fact that. You spent so much time on writing 102 chapters makes me ecstatic! It's like finding the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow! I really enjoy your decriptiveness when you inteoduce the characters.

This chapter needed to be dialogue heavy. I really liked it, but you know I love my Ezekiel.

Minor thing: there's a couple of awkward tense shifts in the paragraph before the dialogue starts.

I think present tense makes perfect sense for what's happening this chapter.

ssg, as usual, a great chapter. I must say, I check ff every day waiting for the next Leadbelly update! And you know, I will stand in line with the rest of the mob if you even try to discontinue this wonderful story.

very well done chapter, this story is doing a good job by churning an inner debate on who i wish faye ends up with

Damn that was a good chapter! But I can understand why it was driving you mad, it seems like it would have been a difficult chapter to write. The final product was wonderful though. I enjoyed it very much, but I must ask, I've been rereading the story and I'm still not sure as to why Spike looks so much like Ezekiel. You need to explain this soon because it's driving me crazy wondering. haha!

Oh, and I have to say, before you let the chapters chase you away from finishing the story...remember we avid readers because I feel you'll have a mob on your hands should you decide to discontinue it...:D It is very well done and intriguing and powerful for you to give up on, and I love it oh so very much. It is truly a joy to read and it helps me hold on to my own inspiration to my own story, so yeah...update update update! Love and well wishes
~Cat

Yay! I have been waiting for this chapter for so long. I can see why you couldn't stop fussing with it -- you have a lot of heavy stuff going on that's difficult to put into words. I'm glad you didn't take a trip into Cliche Land to pull it all off. I just love the emotion you write into your stories...it feel so natural, and is heart-wrenching without being overly dramatic. I love it!

I don't really have any constructive criticism, but I DO have a demand. I ned to know why Ezekiel and Spike look so similar! It's been keeping me up nights! ...Well, okay, not really, but I am curious. And the whole love triangle between them is driving me crazy. Can't she just get with both of them? It could be sort of like Big Love.