|Reviews for It must be him|
| Aviatress 9/24/12 . chapter 24
To all of you who read this comment:
I have noted that some comments on this story are absolutely vile. I was disgusted that anyone on fanfiction could say things like this. Have respect for the author, who is providing you with a good story, which you MUST be enjoying or you wouldn't be reading and reviewing. It was appalling how a review said about how this author can't write, and I know for a fact that this person CAN. Fanfiction's motto is 'unleash your imagination', and everyone has the right to, and if it isn't to your taste, then don't review- simple.
I have belonged to many a fan site, and seen a fair share of bad reviews, but these were astoundingly horrid. I suggest that in future you think carefully about what you write as a review, because you can get in an awful lot of trouble, and it is not pleasant in the slightest.
If you have constructive criticism, fine, but don't be incredibly rude and disrespectful about it.
If you have any problems with that, I still suggest you think about what I said.
Thank you for your consideration.
| Sashi4040 9/24/12 . chapter 24
Okay, I actually re-read this newer version and while overall I see no problems with it as far as plot and characters go, the end here seriously concerns me and I will tell you why.
No police officer is going to point his weapon at ANYONE as a joke, no matter if the gun is unloaded. That is an extremely dangerous thing for someone to do and the FIRST thing they teach you in any kind of firearms safety class is that you NEVER EVER EVER point a weapon, even a pellet or airgun, at someone, even if meant in a joking manner. There have been countless cases of people getting killed by someone "joking" around with a supposedly unloaded weapon, but instead there's a round left in the chamber that they don't know about and the gun goes off and kills the person. When I was a kid, a neighbor child got into his father's gun cabinet and was fooling around with the weapons inside, showing off for a couple of his friends because he thought that all the guns were unloaded, but one happened to have a round in the chamber that he didn't know about and he accidentally shot and killed his best friend. He was only 10 years old and by the time he got into his 20's, he was an alcoholic and a drug addict because he couldn't deal with what he'd done to his friend, and when he was 25 or so, he wound up killing himself with the same gun he shot his friend with.
So NO self-respecting cop is going to pull their weapon like that, even if they KNOW it's unloaded. Police officers have to undergo firearm safety courses while they're in the academy and that would be one of the very first things they're taught...you never pull your gun as a joke like that, and if you do pull your weapon, you'd better have a good reason, like your life or someone else's life is in danger. My uncle is a cop and like he's said, once that weapon leaves the holster, you're one step closer to taking someone's life with it and you'd better have just cause for pulling it because if you shoot someone without reason, you will be brought up before a review board and likely fired, plus you can be held both criminally and civilly liable for taking the life of an innocent citizen. Guns are not toys and they're not to be treated lightly like that, so I seriously doubt Erik is going to pull his weapon on Erika as a joke, because it won't be a joke if he shoots and kills her by accident. I think he would be utterly devastated if he killed her because of his own stupidity, and I don't think Erik is that stupid or reckless, especially when it comes to his loved ones.
So you might really consider revising your ending and taking that part out because anyone with sense will know that it's incredibly wrong what you've written. It makes your characters look bad when they act in such a careless manner, especially if they're police officers and would be trained in firearm safety.
| trrmo77 9/23/12 . chapter 24
Wonderful ending! I really like the addition, the upcoming adoption and and Erik selling his music! Perfect way to wrap it up! You've done a great job! I believe that it went very well! Thank you for sharing your gifts with us!
| MarilynMonroe1962 9/22/12 . chapter 24
You'd THINK after 16 stories, you'd start getting better at writing, but I guess not. You've completely trashed both Adam-12 and Phantom of the Opera, along with police work, since not a single iota of what you wrote is in any way accurate OR realistic. FYI, police officers are bound by a higher code of ethics and so for Erik to "arrest" Erika, placing her in handcuffs and hauling her off to the interrogation room, that kind of action would get him fired and likely arrested himself for false imprisonment. Oh, I know you wrote it to be all cutesy-poo with their relationship so your fans would squeal in delight at how romantic Erik was in how he proposed, but if he did that in real life, they'd be saying their vows in the prison chapel. As to the scene where he got shot in the face during the diner robbery, apparently you've used cartoons as your reference there because in real life, bullets cause what we call "damage" to a person, and if someone got shot in the face like he did, there is NO way he'd be up and moving around, he'd be either dead or incapacitated to the point where he couldn't move because you know what's behind your facial structure? Your brain and your spinal column, and unless those were Nerf bullets Vince was firing, I'm pretty sure Pete/Erik would be down for the count if he sustained a bullet wound to the head. I also chuckled at your headline "Girl Strips For Police Officers" because apparently the big news of the day was not the major robbery/hostage situation in which Pete/Erik got injured in, but Erika's alleged striptease at the scene. You also might consider crediting the scenes you copied word for word from the Adam-12 episodes because otherwise this is plagiarism, and you also should consider doing that thing called "research" when you write about a real-life job like police work, because you not only did that job a disservice by portraying it in the shoddy manner you did, but you also seriously proved how little you know about Adam-12. If you're considering writing a Bonanza story, please make sure you watch the show thoroughly before you begin writing. It might be wise to get a beta, too, there are a TON of mistakes in here as far as crimes against writing techniques, and in case you don't know, mistakes like that can and do seriously detract from the storyline. Too bad Pete and Jim can't arrest you for your story writing.
| Phanatic01 9/22/12 . chapter 24
Aw great ending!
| Katdancer 9/22/12 . chapter 23
Nope. No disappointed person here ;) I like her little fit. Hehe there was only one time I caught the name Petra though. Just pointing it out I know you go fast. Thanks for the update
| Phanatic01 9/22/12 . chapter 23
Oh wow! you wrote this chapter spot on right down to the last detail! This is one of my favourite chapters so far and so I cannot wait to read more! Aw Erik and Erika are so so happy now but no doubt there will be ups a downs along the way.
I didn't get the chance to review the last chapter but all I'll say is haha clever Erika!
These two chapters have not disappointed!
| trrmo77 9/22/12 . chapter 23
You didn't disappoint at all - it was great! I love the "arrest" - that was classic! :)
And... the proposal and being "found" was the best! They are precious together! Very well done! I hope Raoul is really gone for good!
| Katdancer 9/21/12 . chapter 22
Hehe. I always liked the dramatics in this chapter :) good job can't wait for the next one!
| trrmo77 9/21/12 . chapter 22
Love it! Love it! Love it! Erika knows what/who she wants - but, she doesn't believe that he wants the same thing... and Erik (dear Erik) - thinks that she is playing games with his heart and can't make up her mind... but - she is BEGGING him (inside of herself) to not give up on them - but I think she thinks it's too late... (uhh.. that was a run-on sentence :)...)
Anyway - I think my 2 favorite lines in the whole story were from Erik at the end, "I'm going to arrest your sister!" and "This game is ending today!" He! He! He! I don't know if it was supposed to be funny, cuz he's not happy, but I laughed anyway! :)
That would be highly amusing if he really were to arrest her! Are you gonna do it?
Okay - looking forward to more! :)
| Andimpink 9/21/12 . chapter 16
I love the song they dance to! I have it on my phone and it is one of my favorites. Nice choice!
| Phanatic01 9/21/12 . chapter 21
Oh why do they have to be so difficult?! Why can't Erik and Erika just run into each others arms and confess their feelings? Well,I guess then there would be no drama and I don't want a story without drama!
I really enjoyed this chapter and I like how Erik is jealous and protective. Is Erika really moving?! No doubt Erik will knock some sense to her:)
God poor Erik:( has had such a rough life up to now and she was finally happy until Raoul came back. And it really is true how similar the two are! I wonder how Raoul is going to take the news? Will he be angry with Erika?
I like the description of Erik in his apartment at the end and that he finally realised that he was alone:(
Foot tapping goodness:) cant wait for the next chapter! (again no surprise there) :D
| trrmo77 9/21/12 . chapter 21
Great chapter! I really like the changes - they are so Erik-y. :)
So... they both believe they have officially broken up, yet they both know that they love each other - kind of mess they are in!
I like her comparisons of Raoul and Erik and the way they dance - very much like their personalities! :)
Good job! Looking forward to more!
| trrmo77 9/20/12 . chapter 20
Poor Erik... he's got it bad... And thanks to Christine - he may actually put up a fight for Erika! :) I hope so!
I still don't like Raoul - too inconsiderate, smooth/slick and self-centered... and if she doesn't like to dance - he said the wrong thing to her... he's one of those guys that just gives you the heebie-geebies (I'm sure that's not spelled right - but you get the picture)... :)
Good for Christine - tyring to help - and Jim too... now let's hope Erika figures it out soon...
Looking forward to more... :)
| trrmo77 9/20/12 . chapter 19
Ohhhh... I didn't read the review you received... but, noting your reaction to it - it makes me quite upset as well... I am so sorry - please know that you are doing a GREAT job and try not to take it personally... you ARE getting better and better with every story that you write. Please be encouraged and don't let this discourage you... just note all of the REALLY good reviews! Praying for you! (no losing weight this time... :) - )
How sad though - that Erik and Erika have to "take a break" - I somehow believe that perhaps Raoul is still awful if he did that once - has he really turned over a new leaf? What will come out next? I hope she isn't blinded by his handsome face and money? She doesn't seem that shallow. Can't wait to find out!
But... at least Erik now knows that he is in love! :) Love the fast updates!