|Reviews for A world without Saiyans|
| riverclan135 11/27/12 . chapter 1
| Sieler 10/12/12 . chapter 3
If you're going to write a story at least do it right. Don't do it in the form you're doing.
Master Roshi: DIE
Like seriously? No one wants to read a story that does that for the entire story.
Try doing something like this,
"Master Roshi, I will never forgive you!" Krillin yelled out towards his master for betraying him.
Krillin quickly ran as fast as he can, he jumped towards the sky then came down then aimed to kicked Master Roshi towards the face, but Master Roshi blocked the kick and threw Krillin towards the wall.
Also to write a good story learn grammar, don't start with "Master Roshi: do you not" Blah blah blah, capitalize the "do"
Not trying to be mean but just want to help you write better stories.