Where is the rest? More!

Thanks for posting this story.

Alas, I couldn't read it to the end due to formal issues.

Please, use paragraphs when a speaking party changes. Also, add some more paragraphs.

Huge walls of text make it hard to discern what is happening and the eyes tend to get lost. This especially happened to me in your second and last paragraph. It's just so huge.

You also have some troubles with punctuation, see this reference: /words/punctuation-in-direct-speech

Also some words are missing and some are wrong. This should not happen and indicates you haven't proofread your fic. You might also want to consider getting a beta to preview your future fiction.

I hope you edit this story as I really do want to read it to its end :)

Please do something about the chunky paragraphs, it's sort of hard to read.

really like this!

Very good story so far, and very intense.

Some things you can do to make it even better...

When the other person says something, use a new line. If you know someone that speaks English well, get them to read through it before posting to check the spelling, and there are several words missing from your sentences. Still, I'm quite eager to read more of this.

This is so good. Please update soon.

Oh, this is good. This is so good. I hope Dex will find out about her feelings.
Hope you can update soon.

Você precisa continuar, oh meu deus, estou tão animada para o próximo capítulo. Gostei muito mesmo, sempre imaginei como Dex reagiria ao segredo de Deb.