Blizz! I see a classic story here in the making. possible even better than mine and ive gotten some pretty good reviews about it. lol. keep it up Ace.

That test sounds like fun haha

You have a decent story concept here. I do think, however, that it is important to use spell check and Microsoft Word.

For example:

[She looked back at me," You have good ears, not many new recruits can do this on their first day, or ever.", she said.]

The above sentence can be reformatted as:

[She looked back at me. "You have good ears; some recruits can't ever do that, let alone execute it on the first day.]

So...besides the grammar errors, a couple of incorrect typos, and a few walls of text...not a bad story. I'll be watching out for it. Keep it flying.

-Sour Citrus

well done. good explanation of his callsign.

This is almost readable. Almost. Are you aware of the fact that you should start a new paragraph when a different character speaks? Apparently not. Also there are those big blocks of texts. This whole thing is really a couple big blocks of text.

Read a fourth grade English textbook and pay attention to it. Assuming you're older than ten years I expect you have already been taught this stuff.

Looks like we meet at last Gryphus 1. Good work

What do you guys think? This Prologue or "Chapter 1" Prologue for the beginning-beginning of this story?