|Reviews for The All Nighter|
| rlrct 11/26/12 . chapter 1
| Guest 11/24/12 . chapter 1
Adorable... all I'm saying.
| bethsthings 11/24/12 . chapter 1
wonderful beautifully done
| JBK 11/23/12 . chapter 1
I really like this scene.
| mad86 11/22/12 . chapter 1
loved it. Perfect length,not too many details. Cute!
| Guest 11/22/12 . chapter 1
Waste good liver making mousse? Never - where would the onions go? Another lovely tale of what could have been.
| Michi uk 11/21/12 . chapter 1
Loved it a sweet and tender story.
| Guest 11/21/12 . chapter 1
None of the above. Nice surprise. Opened my personal e-mail account to find notice of these JAG stories. Brought back fond memories of my past obsession with these characters. You still don't disappoint. I am a fan of your writing. Great work as usual!
| marye904 11/20/12 . chapter 1
I liked it. It was sweet.
| bookimpva 11/20/12 . chapter 1
I like it. Great explanation for Mac's tattoo and a beautiful explanation of its significance.
| jpstar57 11/20/12 . chapter 1
Very nice and very tender. You have a gift.
| carolfd 11/20/12 . chapter 1
Loved it, TR.
| alix33 11/20/12 . chapter 1
"I don't own JAG, but if I did I would have had Mac get pregnant by Harm in Season 8, as they had been secretly married for 6 months." - I like your version better than the penicillin fungus that was TPTB's season 8, especially the latter part of it.
"just short sighted." - "short-sighted" gets hyphenated.
"I'll make due Commander." - "I'll make do Commander".
"He wanted to ignore her. Didn't want to get into how his heart hammered, his palms sweat, when she was around. Didn't want to deal with any of it on top of the menial mundane tasks he was obligated to spend his whole night completing. He neglected to clue his mouth in to the turmoil in his mind, and before he knew it he heard his own voice calling, "It's open!" - Harm's clueless mouth and what it said made me laugh.
As did "enormous cauldrons" and "kegs of caffeine".
"buying them for her when they'd done their first all nighter together." - "all-nighter" gets hyphenated.
"allowing her to use it to steady the barrels of hot liquid she was still holding. She huffed out a breath when they were sitting safely on the counter. Harm set the bag beside them and let out a low whistle. "What'd you hijack a coffee tanker?" - The "barrels of hot liquid" and the mental pic of a "coffee tanker" made me laugh.
"What'd you hijack a coffee tanker?" "Yes I did. I'm here to beg sanctuary before they catch me and lock me up." - Hehehe, though it IS only fair that Harm reciprocate: Last time Mac provided a fugitive Harm sanctuary.
"She shrugged. "We have a lot to do, I figured we'd need it." He raised an eyebrow. "We?" "You came to me and said you were overwhelmed, remember? I thought I could lend a hand." Folded his arms over his chest. "I thought you weren't allowed to help me." A glint came to her eye, "I won't tell if you won't." - Hehehe.
"And a good looking woman at that." - "good-looking" gets hyphenated.
"Before Harm could respond his guest stepped up. "You didn't tell me you had a lady Commander. And a good looking woman at that." He offered his hand. "Terrance Minnerly." Mac gave him her best grin. "Sarah Mackenzie. It's a pleasure to meet you." She turned to the contents on the counter and pulled a smaller carrier with only slightly smaller cups resting on it, from the bag. "We have three coffees, three hot chocolates, and various assorted pastries." Harm recognized her standard offerings when faced with an all nighter. "Would you like something Mr. Minnerly?" She lifted a particularly moist looking cheese cake filled croissant from the bag. "They're fresh." His eyes glowed as he took it from her outstretched hand. "You're an angel." He turned to Harm. "She's smart too. How is it you're not married to this creature?" The question gave both of them pause, but Mac recovered quicker. "It's as complicated as this," she paused her eyes settling on Harm, "he never asked," she said lightly. Dumbstruck Harm stared at her. Her face showed genuine sadness with a glaze of very real amusement." - Those paragraphs were very funny.
"Something he wasn't quite ready to let out of it's cage." - "out of its cage".
"You're a good man Harm." "So are you. I mean uh... you're not a man but you're...good." He stopped while he was behind. The sincerity in her voice touched something deep inside him. Something he wasn't quite ready to let out of it's cage. He dropped his gaze almost shyly," - AW!
"He watched as she read the first page and noted with amusement the incredulity that slid onto her face. He liked seeing it there. Liked seeing that crinkle she got above her nose when her mind what screaming 'what the Hell?!' - That was SO sweet, how well Harm knows Mac's facial expressions.
"The case of the money and the Muffy." Mac gasped, sputtered in an attempt to keep her coffee from flying from her lips. "Excuse me?" Harm, barely able to keep his composure, regrouped maintaining his posture and tone. "Petty officer Lula Redlips - I kid you not, that's her name - is requesting that her will be revised, and everything she owns be left to her standard Poodle. Muffy Redlips." His mouth quivered, as he tried to hold in the laughter. "A picture of Muffy is..." Snicker "...enclosed." Mac set her coffee to the side and leaned over to have a look. She couldn't hold back the laughter. "Harm, that dog is pink." He grinned. "I know. She actually has a pink poodle. How did this person get accepted into the Navy?" "Hey, she couldn't be rejected on the basis of her pink poodle anymore than I could be on account of these slippers." She leant back jutting her pink furry pig shaped footwear into the air. "I love those slippers!" He said, reached out, squeezed the plastic nose and listened to it "oink" back at him. "I know you do. I didn't forget you know. We can't have an all nighter without the all nighter slippers." "And what if I tell your fellow Marines about your all nighter slippers, Colonel?" She chucked her balled up napkin at him. "Then I'll just have to show them those Betty Boop Boxers your modeled for me last year." "You wouldn't dare! I've got a reputation to protect!" Her eyes flashed. "Oh but I would, Commander. Not only do I have the actual shorts in question, I have digital photos in my work and home computers with explicit instructions to distribute them to all the local media and dating services if anything should happen to me." He laughed, watched her wink at him, and wondered where that woman had been for the better part of two years. He'd missed her. He'd missed being the man who brought out this side of her. "Well then, Colonel. It looks like we've got to stay partners. We have too much dirt on each other." - Those paragraphs were very funny, Mac's piggy slippers with sound effects and Harm's cartoon boxers a fair bit more so than the petty officer and the poodle, though.
"Mac set the picture back in the file, studied the shot of the young man's shaved head bearing the tattoo of a stubbly little cartoon man pushing a tooting lawn mower around his hair line as if the hair has been disposed of in that fashion. "I don't know who came up with it, but they get a ten for imagination." Harm ran a hand through his hair. "Is this for real? This is what they give me?" His eyes met hers. His mouth quirked. "Of course you have a tattoo that you refuse to show me or tell me what it is. Am I now to assume that it might look something like this?" Her brow creased in incredulity. "No way! I don't think I've ever been THAT drunk!" "It is pretty bad! Although, I'm not sure it compares to leaving your life savings to a pink poodle." Her eyes sparkled with challenge. "I don't know. I'm going to need a side by side comparison." He picked up the picture of Muffy and set it beside the shot of the cartoon tattoo. Their eyes volleyed between the pictures, and each other. Back and forth until the laughter grew too large to contain, and they collapsed under the weight of it. They laughed until their sides hurt. Until they forgot how long it had been since happiness and cheer had surrounded them. It burst forth coating everything around them like a thick beautiful blanket of fresh snow. Covering their stresses, their worries, their pain, bitterness, scars. Leaving the air fresh and cool, their hearts protected and pure, and un-trodden upon. It drew them together in a comfort and peace they hadn't known for far too long." - AW!
"You really want to see my tattoo?" Every thought he had came to a screeching halt. Complete with the jolt of the brakes and the scent of burnt rubber. His pen clattered to the floor. He stilled, watching her for a moment. She was still staring at the file in front of her, but color had risen high in her cheeks. She looked bashful, nervous, adorable. "Yes," He said simply. She nodded. Remained where she was. Just for one moment longer. Then slowly stood up. "I've shared too much with you, not to share this too." - AW!
Do Mac and Harm realise the word "jackass" has been turned into a term of endearment by Abbey Bartlet, first lady of the US, in "The West Wing"?
"On the right side of her breast was circular tattoo, with a rose and vines winding around it. He leaned in, studying it closely. Too focused to realize that if he'd licked his lips, his tongue would have skimmed her nipple. Upon further examination he realized that it was a coin. With a triangle design in the center. He read the words aloud. "To thine own self be true." "It's the recovery coin for AA." She explained when she saw that he couldn't quite place it. Recognition showed on his face. "It's for strength." "Yes." "And the rose winding around it?" "The rose was added much later." "What's that for?" Her eyes swam. "For my weakness?" He frown in confusion. She took a deep shuddering breath. "I met you in a rose garden." His eyes flew to hers. Looked deep. "I make you feel weak?" "Oh yes. In the knees. In the heart. Scary. So damned scary sometimes." - AW!
"He frown in confusion." - "He frowned in confusion."
"His eyes flew to hers. Looked deep. "I make you feel weak?" "Oh yes. In the knees. In the heart. Scary. So damned scary sometimes." He leant down. Ever so gently tracing the vines of the rose with the tip of his finger. Her skin quivered. Nipple puckered. "Same goes," He whispered. And she almost wept at the awe in his voice. The wind whirled around them in a mix of heat and healing and understanding and love. So much love. Love that had been circling so long that it was a sigh of relief when it finally knew where to land. Slowly he lowered his head, and laid a barely there kiss over the tattoo. And she was weak again, in the knees, in the heart. With a respect that bordered on reverence he reclasped her bra and covered her back up. And then she was in his arms. Somehow she knew, she'd never be anywhere else. Never again." - AW!
| Ciara 11/20/12 . chapter 1
Well I liked it! Are you planning to add any more to it?