| Reviews for Purpleluva01's 30 Parts Of A Whole |
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Salad Shooter 3/8/13 . chapter 5Lol. Dak Hamee giving video game advice. Also, yay for a look at Barafin! I've always felt that he never got enough attention as a character. There was some awkward wording/grammar errors in this chapter. I'd suggest having someone look it over for you before you post. |
Salad Shooter 2/13/13 . chapter 4Awwww _ this chapter is adorable. There needs to be more early-on Dak/Aldrea stuff like this, before they get all jaded from fighting the Yeerks :( |
Chiroptera Jones 2/12/13 . chapter 1Aww, this is very sweet. You seem to have left out some words when describing the flower, though - the sentence doesn't make sense. You're also a bit contradictory on how rare it is - it's rare, but you can always see some of it at certain trees. It's often used for courting, but rarely used because it's so hard to find. Also, after thoughtspeech or thoughts, the 'she' in the dialogue tag shouldn't be capitalised, because it's still the same sentence. |
Elfera 11/21/12 . chapter 1 HOLY ZEUS! That was adorable. |