|Reviews for Untitled|
| Charles 3/26/13 . chapter 1
I do like the idea of guessing what Mono would have thought upon awakening. At the end of Shadow of the Colossus there are birds and deer in the garden. The only issue I have is at the start of this story Mono does not recognize the baby as Wander and even goes as far as to think that she will never see him again, but at the end she calls the baby Wander. Other than that, nice little story!
| GingerDixie 1/21/13 . chapter 1
Why does she remember Agro but not Wander? Actually, it does seem like she remembers him, but why doesn't she really show any sign of missing him? He practically killed himself trying to save her!
Why is the temple suddenly populated with animals, when in-game not even Wander could reach the top without an extremely complex path up the side of the temple using complex mechanics that in and of themselves were frustrating to do? Better yet, how did the horse get up there? Why is Mono so jolly about being stuck in a land she doesn't know and absolutely no idea how she got there and how she's going to get home? And how's she so sure she can take care of a baby, a bird, and a horse with little to no resources?
I think you need to take a more realistic look at this game and the universe that it's set in, because there's no way in hell it should be this sugar sweet.
| TheFreelancerSeal 12/9/12 . chapter 1
It's not a bad story. It's a nice little look at Mono after she comes back to life. I can imagine she would wonder how she eneded up where she is. And that's interesting to think that maybe there's a bit of Wander in that hawk, and that she'll take care of it and the baby. It's a short, but still good look into the moments right after the game ends. I really like the part when Mono begins to think about Wander. That line about keeping his name close also seems like a really powerful line. Wander may be gone, but Mono can keep something of him.
There are some things I would like to point out though:
"She said, the young child's hair between its horns and holding it close."
It does look like there's a word missing. It just seems like an incomplete sententce.
I also notice that you use the word minus twice in this. Now, this may be more me than anything, but I just think that maybe there's a better word. I've been called myself on using the same word too soon, and in such a short story, it really stands out.
That's just my opinion of course. It's still a good little story, especially for your first in Shadow of the Colossus. And even though we're not reviewing the artwork, I really like the cover too.
| Guest 12/7/12 . chapter 1
interesting. good work.