Wow. Very emotive, and the little touches of irony, like "He wants a mother's comfort" were wonderfully painful. :)

This was good, but you repeat most of the poem. Not that I didn't like, it was really dark. Didn't they have two kids. Nasty.

Wow! THAT WAS GOOD!

P.S. hey, don't be so hard...the only types of poetry I know are the rhyming kind! And haikus, so this is good!

Wow! THAT WAS GOOD!

P.S. hey, don't be so hard...the only types of poetry I know are the rhyming kind! And haikus, so this is good!

Excellent poem. Imagery is powerful in a good way. Some lines didn't seem to fit in particularly, but on the whole, well done. I adored your last line.

Both beautiful and terrible at the same time. The color make it exceptionally vivid... (ruby, crimson, sapphire) though a less cliche color word for blue might be interesting. Just a random thought - I'm a color freak and obsess over writing color synonyms... Anyway, I found myself gripping the edge of my chair. :)