|Reviews for The 18th: Standing in their Graves|
| JabberjayHeart 3/24/13 . chapter 11
Making sure I keep up with all of my reviews on time. Be proud, Chaos, this is like the only story I can keep myself up-to-date on!
Desire: well, well, well. I shouldn't be surprised one bit that Teddy got this spot. I mean, he is a District One female as Megan kindly pointed out... Desire is decent, I admit. Teddy's tributes always seem complex and vivid, and Desire is no different. I like her name (as always!). For now, her personality is a little stereotyped, but I'm no doubt waiting on the day it'll surprise us. Her views on the Capitol being beautiful really shows a different side to her... yes, I like her, for now. I have a thing for all Careers anyway so ;)
Ainsley: this name! THIS NAME. I don't care what people say, this name is pure perfection and I love it and I will defend it against the rest of the world if I have to! I love the fact that he seems smarter than the average psychopathic, bloodlusting, crazy, murderous or, worse of all, nice clichéd Career. He sounds a little egotistical which is expected with this district, but again, I feel like there is more.
I have to admit, Chaos, this is by far one of my favourite chapters, hehe. Desire and Ainsley are two tributes I think will go far, and I have to admit, they make my top spots easily. In all honesty, I do prefer Ainsley to Desire, but she's close behind.
| Acereader55 3/24/13 . chapter 7
Okay, another review from me today xD District 5 this year was quite intriguing, one being very interesting and the other is actually one of my favorites as of now.
Marlee: This is actually the one that is my favorite right now. Her, Visca, and Eris are my top three as of now and I just find her so interesting and fascinating, yet normal at the same time. Her whole attitude was definitely of a normal teenager, but the part that made her stand out from being just a normal tribute (like Cathodra from 3) was that her sister is a drunk and has sex every night. I felt that gave her the added twist that some of the other tributes could use. The escort was actually hilarious, it literally made me burst out into a fit of laughter :D Her friendship with Skye was genuine and endearing and I quite liked that, it made me think of some of my friendships and what I would do if one of them were reaped. Overall, I loved her and she has now become my second favorite tribute to date.
Elmo: First of all, the name -.- Really? I get that it has something to do with electronics and stuff but still, the name already turns me away from him. He seemed to be a typical pyro that loved his fire, but the only thing that set him apart to me was that he wears black make-up? I mean, if he hates getting made fun of so much then why is he giving the tormentors a chance to make fun of him? It's almost like asking the bully to make fun of him. The friendship between his friends were really nice and showed a refreshing side of him that I didn't think we would get to see, but it was nice to see that side. Overall, it was well-written but I don't know if I'll be rooting for him until we see some more from him.
I prefer Marlee to the two :)
| Acereader55 3/24/13 . chapter 6
Okay, after a little break from writing my reviews I am back! Okay, District three this year was... interesting to say the least, However I'm not sure that these characters are good.
Phi: First of all, the name irritates me -.- I just don't like the name, I don't know why but I just don't like it one bit. Secondly, I feel that this was way unrealistic. If some child was walking around with a brick, I'm sure someone would've noticed and I'm sure that the wife would've screamed instead of just standing there watching Phi murder her husband. In addition to that, Peacekeepers definiely would have noticed the head person not being there on time, so I feel that the whole POV was very unrealistich, which unfortunately tainted my view on Phi. The writing was brilliant as always, I just found the plot to be non-believeable. Phi as a character was alright- not my favorite so far but not the worst either, so we'll have to wait and see where he ends up for me.
Cathodra: Another character that I have conflicted feelings about. She seemed normal enough to the point where it was almost too normal for my liking. She had good family dynamics, and she had good friends and all, but I was just waiting for that added little twist that would make me really like her. Her personality was a little bland and I didn't really get much out of her, but maybe as the story progresses we will get to see her personality shine through a little bit more. Overall, she's in the middle of the pack for me: Not the worst but not the best either.
I think I actually prefered Cathodra out of the two, but only by a little bit since both of them were in the middle for me.
| nb1998 3/24/13 . chapter 7
All of these characters are so interesting, and these two were greatly written as well.
Marlee: I kind of like her, certain aspects. It felt like it was everyone else that all the interest was placed on. I didn't get as much from her more from all her family and friends but maybe it's meant to be lile that. Maybe she's someone who likes to stay in the shadows, she does seem like a nice normal girl who just likes to hang around with her friends. There was little bits where I saw a different part of her like when Skye was talking about boys and at the end when it came quite depressing. I do like her but I hope she becomes even more interesting.
Elmo: Ahh loved this name and it's even better that it actually had something to do with the district. Another pyromaniac hmm... they're getting repetitive but he seemed different. He's even weirder than normal and I like how he's not denying it. His whole friend group is weird and he wears make-up.. I actually thought the description of all the flames were amazing and definitely some of your best writing. He's quite a cool character.
| sock-feet-and-stirring-sand 3/24/13 . chapter 11
I feel like I shouldn't like Desire, but there's something about her that's intriguing. She's spoiled and full of herself but for some reason it doesn't annoy me as much as with other stuck-up tributes I've seen. I don't know why. Ainsley definitely has guts. And it didn't go unnoticed that he didn't let anyone volunteer for him, that he went into the Games the same way Flavia did :') that's my little psychopath :') okay that was weird. Anyway. I forgot to review last chapter but I think not straight-up saying "both these characters were interesting" in this review makes up for it.
| Acereader55 3/24/13 . chapter 5
Okay, so this district was definitely very interesting and I actually like both tributes for once xD They were both very different and unique in their own way which is nice to read about.
Shiloh: He wasn't as different as I would've liked, but he was out of the norm which is cool. I feel that the beginning of his point of view was nicer to read about rather than the end because the end is where we started to see the cliche side of him. The typical story of the bullies tormenting the kid who gets reaped. I feel bad to say it but it's overdone and took away from the great character that was built up in the early stages of his point of view. I felt that he was unique enough to keep me satisfied with him but he wasn't 100% different to make me love him. Being an artist was a nice tocuh so I did enjoy a small little detail like that. Overall, he was decent but I don't know just yet if he will become a favorite of mine.
Visca: Now this character is BEYOND unique. I LOVE HER! This is the first character in this story that I am absolutely in love with and will probably cry when she dies. I don't know exactly what sold it for me, but her having a fake nose and the whole flashback scene was just plain amazing. Chaos, the way you wrote this character was amazing and whoever created her thank you for making such a unique and different and amazing character. Her fear of going outside because people would reject her was realistic, and the whole scene with her father having to carry her to the reapings was just so saddening, I felt so bad for her. For some reason, my gut tells me she has a strong chance this year. I don't know why, but I think she has a really good chance to go far and possibly even win these Games. Overall, love her and she is definitely my favorite thus far.
I definitely prefered Visca this chapter, however I did like Shiloh as well.
| Acereader55 3/24/13 . chapter 4
Okay, so here I am with another review. I usually don't like District 12 because most of them paint a picture that they're so weak and that you should feel bad for them, but these tributes actually didn't do that so that was a nice surprise to me.
Eris: I actually quite like him and his whole character. He was just so normal that I can't help but feel bad for him and I want him to do well. I don't think that he'll last long because of his age and because he doesn't seem to have any special skill, but I would love to see him develop some more and grow into a good character. I like how he doesn't try and make you feel bad for him and how he tries to get himself confident about who he is and how he might be able to win the Games. The part with his little sister was very well written, it actually really touched me. Overall, I actually quite like Eris and can't wait to see him develop some more.
Kyra: Okay, this part may sound really harsh when I have no intention of making it sound harsh xD I really, really, REALLY don't like her. She is over the top cliche and she doesn't have anything special to her. She is this typical little character that has one best friend and has a loving family that she is trying to get home to. Whoever the creator is I think might've tried a little to hard to get people to garnish sympathy for her, which isn't a bad thing all the time but in this case it was. She doesn't have anything special or unique about her, so there's really no prmise to her. I do like how you portrayed her reaction to her getting picked and I liked how you had the whole scene with the whole family there. Overall, don't like her at all and I think she is very cliche.
Okay so out of these two I definitely prefer Eris.
| Acereader55 3/24/13 . chapter 3
Okay, time for my second review in a row! District 2 this year seems interesting, yet both the tributes aren't what I prefer.
Melody: Okay, immediately I can tell she'll just be a typical, glory hunting, attention seeking career that only volunteers for the fame and fortune. Don't get me wrong, every story needs a tribute like that, I just don't fancy those types of tributes. Her part with the dialouge was a little confusing to me, but that's just me. I'm also interested to see what the whole Lillith thing is about, that intrigued me. Her relationship with her brother is endearing, and it is a side of Melody that I like, however it doesn't make up for her character as a whole. Overall, you portrayed the whole 'career stereotype' very well but I don't like Melody and won't be rooting for her at all.
Andras: Hm, I don't know what tp think of him. I like him as a character and definitely prefer him to Melody, yet I can't help but think that the whole 'poor, beaten kid' thing is so overused that he's not original. Obviously the whole kiss scene at the end of the point of view was very different and nice to read, but I don't know if that can make up for the whole overused character idea. Another thing that kind of bothered me in the POV was that he kind of volunteered out of nowhere. I almost feel like that was a little unrealistic that he volunteered so quickly and that he would leave Grant so quickly for something that probably won't happen. Overall, I'm conflicted on him as a whole and until we hear more from him I can't really decide whether I like him or not.
From now on I'll just put which tribute I prefer out of the two. For this district I prefer Andras out of the two.
| Cashmere67 3/24/13 . chapter 11
you are perfect
..Am I biased? Sure, but this was my favorite chapter so far. Desire and Ainsley are so opposite to each other, and I don't know why, since they sure some of the same characteristics, but something about them.. Blah. Me explaining things is a tragedy.
I really like your writing for a lot of reasons - run on sentence time - but I like it because it isn't too pretentious and you don't try too hard it just sort of flows it seems and i love your vocabulary and dialogue and details and whatnot and the writing is so nice to read since it's comprehensible and yeah it's nice okay it is just go with it
Desire: yes omfg you got her perfectly and there isn't much else to say but some things that stood out to me in her chapter was: The opening, with her talking about beauty and things of that nature, so yeah. And then her and her family, especially with her mother. And then her and Heliotrope. And then her and the other people in the District, especially that girl who slept with that boy.
"Well, I'm just living up to my name!" I'm only half-joking.
Favorite line? I think so
Ainsley: Ehhh. His name kills me; I don't like it, eh eh eh. It sounds like an old-lay name or something. Go figure; Immy made this tribute. Anyway, I'm a fool and always like Careers.. but him, I don't know. I might like him, I might not, and that all depends on what happens in the Capitol. Grimm and Kemper got my attention more, but still, I caught onto him and learned a lot about him. I liked the opening of his POV for some reason, I don't know why.. but I just did. I never really like Reaped-Careers, but I'll let it slide since he sort of accepted his placement as tribute.. I guess. Yeah, well. He's confident, but not arrogant, is intelligent and very refined. I liked when he was describing Desire, too.
Yes I am biased and feel the need to have a shoutout to my girl Desire
but yeah I like Desire more then Ainsley
| Cashmere67 3/24/13 . chapter 4
Review day! A few days *coughweeks* late.. but eh.
Eris was alright. Nothing spectacular, to be honest.. he's naive, cheery, optimistic, and innocent. I am never a big fan of little children since they never realize the consequences of the Games and what could actually happen to them. He isn't stereo-typically nice or naive, which is an interesting thing because he comes off as it.. but once you read more about him, he's different for some reason. I liked him and his family and sister, and I want to see how he interacts with other tributes in the Capitol. I like his name too.
Kyra; I love her name, ahaha. Just like Eris, she is very innocent, naive, and "average", if that makes sense. She's normal and relatable.. which is always nice to have a tribute that you can relate to. She has a large family, which means a lot of support, but I don't think she'll do well in the Games. She definitely isn't ready for the games and still has a lot to learn. I like her goodbyes a lot, since during the goodbyes you learn a lot more about the tribute.
Okay, so, for this chapter: It's a tie, basically. I like both of them the same, but that might change.
| Acereader55 3/24/13 . chapter 2
Okay, time for me to get around to reviewing. I apologize in advance if there are any spelling mistakes as I am on my phone for this review.
Barke: seeing as he is my tribute i won't really comment on him. I will say that you did a great job at portraying him and his disgust for his job and for the love of his family. I just want to say for everyone that thinks he's cliché: he's only 18 and if you were in his position you would hate that job too and would think of yourself as disgusting for doing that job but you would keep doing it for the sake of your family. Even though its a story these are still people and if you were in his position that's what you would be thinking too. Sorry, angry rant over haha.
Alyx: Well, we certainly have a firecracker and troublemaker here. She's interesting, I'll give her that. I like how she hides that side of her from her parents, its tragic but makes for a good story. However, I almost feel like she was a little bland and I don't think that she'll be one of my favorites.
Okay, time for me to read and review the next chapter!
| DA Member Hogwarts 3/24/13 . chapter 11
A whole chapter dedicated to Teddy? Great. He's unbearable as it is XD hah, kidding ... kind of.
Anyway, nah, he is obsessed with the ole luxury District... no idea why but sure hey.
Why do I even like Desire? I mean... she is ridicolous but I do.
I am sensing she has an eating disorder of some sort and I will always have a soft spot for anyone- real or fictional who suffers from such a thing. Well, I could be wrong. She could just be so obsessed with beauty that she wants to stay thin but the way she spoke of it I sense it is more than that.
She is very deluded and naive and for some reason I like that about her. Yes, she is arrogant and shallow- two things I either hate or laugh at but it is expected from a District One female even if she is more extreme than some. But there is a vulnerablity to her and I also detect that she is a bit mentally unstable... again I could be wrong but of all the careers so far, it is her I want to learn more about because the way she thinks is so relentless and I want to know more about it.
She is obviously very sly and ruthless to plan on volunteering and tell no one, even though she knew her best friend wanted to volunteer. Well if my friends wanted to volunteer I would do it first because they are all idiots and they'd probably die during training or the interviews :/ LOL well that is besides any point I am trying to make.
Okay, over all I find her annoying and her views are a bit sick with everything revolving on beauty- she even finds the games to be a beautiful concept but she is certainly intriguing and for some reason I do feel a bit of affection for her.
Okay now for Ainsley. OMFG GRIMM! Tac Nayn's tribute XD I read the form and so I was dissapointed that she sent him in too late but HEY! here he is making an appearance- I just find him really cool and Kemper is pretty hilarious. I always laugh at people who well... aren't so great but they are really arrogant about it XD He's so hot-headed.
Anyway, enough of them, onto Ainsley...
LOL Grimm and Kemper fighting was hilarious :') I was all into Ainsley's thoughts on the book and survival skills for a moment then they arrived and I was like HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Okay! I can't stop getting distracted by those two...
So he isn't like the district one sterotype at all which is nice. Any career who relies more on knowledge and spends a lot of time reading is pretty different well as syots go anyway. Especially since he's from one and they are usually just arrogant or pretty looool so I liked that aspect of him.
I didn't mind him but he didn't stand out much to me. Maybe because I was so intrigued by Desire and then I was obsessed with Grimm and Kemper :/ lol.
So he was not a volunteer? Yeah Immy would do that XD She has to be awkward. Hah, naw. It was realistic because it wasn't like- oh he was reaped and no one voluntereed booooo-hoooo it was like nah bitches I'm the best anyway so don't even volunteer LOL I liked that about him... for some reason, even though I am totally exxagerating it as usual.
All I got from Ainsley is that he is calm and intelligent and doesn't seem to be overly arrogant or aggressive or any of that though he is still confident about himself and his abilities otherwise he wouldn't have been so calm about being reaped.
I think I did quite like him but I'll need to see some more of him to me sure.
I liked Desire a bit more but neither of these have been my favourite so far but hey what do you expect, IT'S ME. Peasants before Careerz, that's my motto.
I love Grimm and Kemper :') Just saying. Just putting it out there.
Happy writtin my little friend XD (even though you are likely taller than me anyway fml)
| Foxface5 3/24/13 . chapter 11
I'm just glad you're back, delay or not :)
Desire is fairly typical, I agree. Though that doesn't make her a bad character and she does have aspects to her that are less sterotypical of a female from one so that she did capture my attention a bit.
She has a naviety to her which is the most likable thing and it won me over for her despite the less than nice qualities she posses.
I do like career tributes but District One seems to be cursed with me, they are never favorites for me but I did like Desire for whatever reason- just how you wrote her thoughts I think :)
Ainsley didn't stand out to me as much for whatever reason and it was the two side characters- Kemper and Grimm who got my attention D: I thought Grimm was awesome... don't want to be mean to Ainsley's creator but in a tiny way I wish Grimm was the tribute, but not, then I may have to read about him dying.
Ainsley is a pretty likable character for a career and for once I do like that he was reaped- it made sense for him to be reaped and still want to go through with it and allow no volunteers.
I did enjoy the chapter a whole lot and all the side characters were brilliant and the two tributes really came to life as you always make them.
I'm looking forward to the remaining reapings.
| Anla'shok 3/24/13 . chapter 11
Desire is the normal 'I've never asked myself a single question in my life and go with the flow' Career tribute. So make-up, loves her family, little empathy for people who stand in their way, and no appreciation of her own mortality. She also is a bitch (unwittingly?) in her thoughts and actions with her friend. She's also freely cruel (in a very 'normal' way).
*they think I'm too frail to be here* and *I'm the best*. Trainers who underestimate Career volunteers are common. Now, I don't think trainers are morons, so this had better mean that Desire is quite average in training and has an attitude that annoys the trainers (which seems to be the case since she's seems to find somewhat unappealing). I picture her as a kid with a seven in training that will flatter the Capitol to death. You can still win with a seven, but if she gets nine or more, it has better be because she's wrong about the 'they think I'm too frail part' and just can't stand her.
What's original about her is that she seems unaware things could be different. She has no distance with her life and it seems she hasn't maken an actual choice (unlike the more bloothirsty careers we see). She's highly unlikable but in a very normal way. Whether she's an airhead or just immature, we'll see.
Ainsley is more likeable because he doesn't feel the urge to feel good about himself by disparaging everyone around him. He's the quiet but power hungry type and he's aware other people can be threats.
Why does he read instead of watching previous Games and interviews? I'd have liked to know the title of his book. It might have given us good insight on HOW smart he is.
He'll fit better in an alliance because he doesn't care about being popular. Desire feels more easily angered.
* I've never trained, I don't know which center I could go to."*
That's utter bullsh*t
Casey probably has a crush on Ainsley and he's too much of a dude too notice...
Okay, this is so common it's almost canon, but I have a hard time buying that top Careers aren't taught basic survival skills. Now if Ainsley knows 'advanced' survival (as in he's learned to swim powerfully, he's learned herbal medicine istead of just knowing the 20 most common plants...), I'd like it to be made clearer. I'd also like supposedly 'clever' Careers to stop for a second and think that there might be a reason random district picked tributes win over a quarter of the Games. Of course, people who think like that don't volunteer, so we don't see them, but it makes 'smart' Careers who aren't super gifted and who aren't in a 'if I don't win my life doesn't matter to me' situation much less clever than they'd like to think they are.
| arkanians 3/23/13 . chapter 11
Desire seems fairly typical. Ainsley, on the other hand, could be one to watch out for.