This story had a very interesting premise. Were the immortals in this story all vampires or was Antoinette a regular immortal like Duncan Macleod. I like how Jim hid he had been attacked because he was embarrassed but everyone was a little off kilter. Simon acted like Blair in his belief in strange things while Blair acted like Simon or Jim. Still it was a good story.

Very interesting premise. You’ve already got me wondering what’s going on! I can’t wait to read more. There are two main things I would note. Your narrative style seems quite...detached. It keeps the reader from being swept up as a part of the story. And while details are good, it’s easy to get *too* detailed—detracting from the main purpose of the piece. Keep up the good work and I can’t wait for the next section!