Ok...First, this is a good plot idea. I like what you have planned but it’s very hard to read with all the spelling errors you have. I tried reading the second chapter but I couldn't. I suggest before uploading your next chapter is to take your story and run it through a Spell Checker in Micro word or what ever you are using, and then throw it back to a text file if that is how you are uploading it here as.
In addition, when you are done with it replace the chapters with the good ones. I'm sorry to say all this but you really need to be careful with your spelling. Therefore, I hope you take this as advice and not as a flame because like I said, very good plot idea, it just needs work in the spelling department.

i loved your story hope to find another that can matche up to it...ja ne

where is the next chap. need next chap...sorry but i love your sory!ja ne

where is the next chap. need next chap...sorry but i love your sory!ja ne

ove it...got to keep this one...got to keep...need more...need more!

Hurry up with the nex chapter!