|Let It Be Me
Author: fantasymonk PM
Sweet little songfic about Zel and Xel getting together... Shounen aiRated: Fiction T - English - Words: 2,527 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 11-10-00 - id: 110259
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
I happened to be singing some old songs with my mom, and this caught my eye and mind as a good possible songfic for Zelgadiss and Xellos. I thought the lyrics were very meaningful. This is my first Slayers fic, so bear with me. There may be a little OOC, so be forewarned.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Slayers characters; they are owned by some lucky person whose name I don't know. I make no profits or money off of this (darn), so please do not sue me. I don't have any money, anyway, so the most you could get is my comic book collection. Arigato for reading!
Let It Be Me
English song lyrics by Mann Curtis
Music by Gilbert Becaud
I bless the day I found you,
I want to stay around you,
And so I beg you,
Let it be me.
Xellos watched Zelgadiss through the window of his room as he packed what little he had and prepared to leave Lina and the others. He just told them that had found a possible cure and that he would be leaving shortly. Xellos couldn't wait until Zelgadiss was on the road; he loved teasing the chimera and trying to get him to come out of his shell. Poor Zel was so easy to get a rise out of, or at least, it was easy for Xellos to do it. He thanked L-sama for putting such a one as Zelgadiss in the world. Something about him drew the mazoku in, made him want to be with him at all times. He felt like a moth around a flame, a blue flame that was Zelgadiss. Somehow, he could never stay away from the chimera for too long. When he noticed Zelgadiss was ready to leave, he shook off his thoughts and prepared himself for the delight of travelling with the chimera. Zelgadiss didn't know it yet, but down the road, he was going to have company.
Don't take this heaven from one
If you must cling to someone,
Now and forever,
Let it be me.
Xellos watched from a distance away as Zelgadiss bade his farewells to the group. He wondered why Zelgadiss searched so hard for his cure; the others obviously didn't care about his appearance. Xellos himself certainly knew that looks weren't everything, and appearances could be deceiving. Yet here Zel was, leaving the people who cared about and understood him, in search of something that he might never find.
"Ah Zel," he murmured, "if only you thought about me as much as you do your cure." Xellos started, wondering where that thought had come from. Before he had time to analyze anything, Zelgadiss was leaving. The mazoku noticed the last glance the chimera cast over his shoulder before resolutely walking away.
"Perhaps he is not so blind as I'd thought," Xellos said to himself. "Still, something drives him toward a cure. Perhaps he is searching for something else and doesn't know it; perhaps it is a way to cling to hope. Certainly a mystery worth investigating." Xellos rubbed his hands together. "And I think I'm just the one to look into this matter." Xellos smiled at the prospect of time alone with the chimera.
Each time we meet love,
I find complete love,
Without your sweet love,
What would life be?
Xellos sat in a tree by a little traveled road, humming softly to himself. He came alert as a figure appeared in the distance. As it neared, the figure was revealed to be Zelgadiss. When the chimera was almost under the tree, Xellos floated out of the tree to a spot just above Zel's head.
"Hello, Zelgadiss, would you like some company?" he said.
The chimera jumped, almost hitting Xellos, and his sword was out in an instant, but he put it away when he saw the mazoku.
"Go away Xellos," he snarled as he continued walking, his mood made worse by the scare the mazoku had given him. Xellos merely smiled cheerfully and fell in beside the chimera.
"I'm afraid I can't do that, Zel. I'm bored, and where you are seems a likely place to find entertainment," the mazoku answered. Zelgadiss refused to look at him as they continued down the road. Xellos took the opportunity to sneak glances at the chimera. From the moment he had floated down to be near Zelgadiss, there had been a painfully sweet feeling in his chest. The time he spent with the reclusive chimera seemed to complete something unfinished inside himself. To his surprise, he discovered that when he wasn't near Zelgadiss, he ached with a longing for something he couldn't touch. Without Zel, he reflected, his life was a little darker.
So never leave me lonely,
Tell me you'll love me only,
And that you'll always,
Let it be me.
One week later, Zelgadiss stalked along the road, refusing to acknowledge the mazoku's presence. Damn fruitcake! He just wanted to be alone when he was depressed. The lead on his cure that he had been following had fallen through, and he wanted to find a place to be by himself and sulk. Grumbling to himself, he shot dirty looks at the mazoku strolling happily beside him. Xellos turned to him.
"What was that, Zel?" he asked. Zelgadiss jumped.
"Nothing," he growled. Xellos continued talking.
"No, really, I'm sure I heard you say something," the mazoku pressed. "I hope it was something about me," he added, still smiling.
"I didn't say anything, Xellos," Zelgadiss reiterated. The mazoku cheerfully ignored him and continued with his babbling.
"Was it something naughty about me? Oh, Zel, I never knew you had such thoughts!" Xellos put a hand to his mouth in mock surprise and horror, his eyebrows raised. Zelgadiss did a full-body twitch, and decided he'd had enough.
"You damn mazoku!" he cursed. "RA TILT!" Xellos phased out in time to avoid getting hit by the blast. When the mazoku didn't return, Zelgadiss continued down the road, relieved to be alone again. At the same time, however, there was a nagging feeling in his head that said being without Xellos seemed wrong. Zelgadiss pushed the thought away and walked farther into the chilly evening. A pair of purple eyes watched him from behind a tree. Xellos sadly watched the chimera leave. The feeling of rightness that had settled over him left with the one who had caused it. Xellos found himself alone again in the cold night.
If for each bit of gladness,
Someone must taste of sadness,
I'll bear the sorrow,
Let it be me.
Zelgadiss sat brooding in a tavern, drinking coffee alone at a table in the corner. His thoughts were dark and dismal. With his hood pulled up and the table in the shadows, Zel was an inconspicuous figure. Thus, he looked up in surprise when he noticed someone standing by him. His expression grew sharper when he saw who it was.
"Xellos, would you quit following me?" he growled. The mazoku smiled happily and sat down next to Zel.
"But Zel, what would you do without me?" he asked, annoyingly cheerful.
"Be happy," Zelgadiss answered, taking a sip of his coffee. He missed the hurt look that appeared on Xellos's face. When he looked up again, he found Xellos leaning on his elbows, staring at him with open eyes and a wide smile. The chimera pulled his hood out further to hide his face from the mazoku's unyielding stare. Xellos had a bad habit of coming around with his cheerful ways when he all he wanted was to be good and depressed, he thought sourly to himself. Suddenly uncomfortable, Zelgadiss gulped down his coffee and left. Xellos followed him outside into the late afternoon air, and Zel turned on him.
"You damn mazoku, just leave me alone!" he shouted. Then he spun around and stalked into the surrounding trees. Xellos looked after him, raising one hand slightly as if to touch a forbidden fruit.
"Ah Zel," he sighed. "Why don't you let me take away your pain?" he asked the retreating figure. Then he squared his shoulders and resolutely followed the chimera into the woods.
No matter what the price is,
I'll make the sacrifices,
Through each tomorrow,
Let it be me.
Zelgadiss had fought the demonic creature by himself for some time in a small clearing, and night had fallen while the fight went on. It had been stronger than he expected, and the battle was not going well for him. Weak from several wounds, he slipped to one knee, holding his sword in front of his body in what he knew was a vain attempt to protect himself. The demon loosed a large amount of power at him, and he watched distantly as it rushed toward him. Then he saw Xellos phase in front of him, taking the blast as he let his own power fly at the creature. The demon existed no more, disappearing with a fearful howl. Xellos turned his head to smile at the man behind him, and then crumpled to the ground. Zelgadiss threw off his surprise and knelt by the wounded mazoku.
"Xellos, why?" he asked, confusion in his voice. Xellos chuckled, the laugh turning into a cough. Zelgadiss could see that he was laboring for breath.
"Sore wa himitsu desu," Xellos answered, giving Zelgadiss a pain-filled smile. The chimera pounded the ground with his fist.
"That's no answer, you fruitcake," he growled. Xellos shrugged weakly.
"Still, it is the one you will get… for now," the mazoku replied. Zelgadiss stood up.
"I have to get you to a safe place," he said, gathering the other man into his arms. Xellos just lay his head weakly against Zel's chest and drifted to sleep as the chimera took off at high speed.
To you I'm praying,
At an inn, Zelgadiss sat in a chair beside the bed that Xellos lay in. The mazoku was sleeping peacefully, his wounds almost nonexistent. Zelgadiss shook his head and marveled at the mazoku's healing ability. He was shaken out of his reverie when Xellos started talking in his sleep. Zel leaned closer, placing a hand on the bed to support his weight, and he heard Xellos say his name, almost reverently, as if it were a prayer. Zel blinked in surprise. Just then the mazoku opened his eyes, fastening them on Zelgadiss. Zel looked back, unsure, then he felt something warm pressing on top of his hand, and looked down to see that Xellos had taken the chimera's hand in his own. He started to pull away, but then he looked into the mazoku's eyes. Some emotion in them made him pause, and then Xellos started to speak.
Hear what I'm saying,
"Zelgadiss, I have been watching you for such a long time. I'm glad I was able to help you today," he said. "I don't know what I would do if something had happened to you." Xellos took a deep breath, gathering his courage. "I want to tell you something. You asked why I helped you. I know the answer I gave was unsatisfactory, so maybe this one will be better," he said, then stopped. Zelgadiss looked at him expectantly. "I helped you because… I love you." Xellos lowered his gaze then, and continued in a rush of words. "I know you hate me, and I'm a mazoku, so I probably disgust you, too. I just felt it was time to tell you the truth. You can curse me and yell now, if you'd like. I'm almost healed, so I'll leave you soon; that should make you happy," Xellos finished. Zelgadiss didn't move; instead, he stared at Xellos in disbelief. Something made a shining path down the mazoku's face, and Zel reached out a hand to touch a finger to the single tear. As if Zel's touch had opened a dam, the one was joined by many more. Xellos sat straight, his shoulders stiff, his eyes shadowed by his bangs. The chimera thought about the mazoku's words, remembered the little things Xellos had done, looked into his own heart, and made a quick decision. Zelgadiss raised the other man's head to meet his own gaze.
"I don't hate you, and you don't disgust me," he whispered, leaning forward. Xellos's eyes opened wider as Zelgadiss took his lips in a gentle kiss.
Please let your heart beat
For me, just me.
Xellos felt such happiness; Zel was kissing him, in the most tender way he could have imagined. A sound of contentment made its way out of him, and Zelgadiss broke off the kiss to hug the mazoku close to him. Xellos found his head once again on the chimera's chest. He could hear the faint heartbeat of the one he loved, and pressed his hand possessively over that spot. The heart that beat under his hand belonged to him; he felt a thrill more heady than any he had ever experienced.
And never leave me lonely,
Tell me you'll love me only,
And that you'll always,
Zelgadiss spoke again, his voice husky.
"Xellos, I love you too; I believe I've always loved you, you fruitcake," Zel said, smiling. Xellos looked at him and smiled back; the term that had been a curse now became an endearment. Xellos opened his mouth to say something, but Zelgadiss placed his fingers over the mazoku's mouth. "I know that you've been more alone than I; I always had someone to talk with, while you had no one. I just want you to know that you'll never be alone. You've got me now, and I'll love you and only you for as long as I live," the chimera finished. Xellos gazed at him in wonder, and then pulled Zel's head down. As their lips met, the sun rose and shone its rays into the room, bathing the two lovers in liquid gold like a benediction. That morning, there was no loneliness for these two who had known nothing else; In each other's arms, two people found the happiness they had been searching for.
Let it be me.