Disclaimers in part one.
Pie. A Journal in Four Parts
I wasn't planning on killing all of them, it just happened. Well, I did
plan on killing all the patrons, and that worked out pretty well. You know
the old schtick, pump the lethal laughing gas through the theatre, then go
There was only one person who I needed to keep alive, the projectionist.
And alive he stayed. For nearly three hours.
But it was horrible.
Not the movie, that was terrible and bloody and a lot of elves died. Damned
elves. And Harley was still in the coma, so it was the first time she ever
kept her yapper shut during a movie, but the projectionist.
I can only be thankful that he died horribly.
Every time the stupid kid went to change reels, the whole image shook. I
yelled once or twice, but mostly ignored it. This was my day. This was my
hour. I was sitting in a theatre full of dead people, watching the Orcs
make MORE dead people (and dead elves), 70 foot wide, larger than life, and
in Technicolor. Thank god for Technicolor.
What really burned my butter is that he shut off the projector before the
movie was over! The credits are still part of the movie! I'd turn him in to
the union, if he weren't in several pieces stashed in various locations
through out the Cineplex. My best work was the bloody red head buried in
the goldeny yellow popcorn. Running his intestines through the projector
was just something I did for fun.
But really, I was going to let the kid go. Till he stopped the projector in
the middle of the credits. I was READING that list of extras!
I dumped Harley outside one of those clinics, you know, the free ones. Just
opened the car door and pushed her out. It was nice finally getting to see
ONE movie from beginning to end without the editorial comments, but.
I thought about killing her to put her out of her misery (or at least out
of mine), but I realized-if I did that, then she wouldn't live to be
tortured another day. And really, what use is she other than that?
Well, Diary, today was a successful day. Since I'm still running free and
all. I thought for sure my ass would be in the can by now. I suppose I
should focus my attention on coming up with a plan.
Life gets tedious sometimes, y'know?
Time for bed. I'm out of pie and the hyenas just ate the last of the
projectionists' innards. I'll tell you all about my plans tomorrow.