The Scavenger Hunt

Part Two

Author: Musedepandora Summary : With the crew coming down with cabin fever, Captain Archer sets his senior officers off on a scavenger hunt. The game turns serious and interesting situations emerge. Attempt at challenge:

Challenge 1 Endeavors Challenge Minimum of 3 pages Porthos referred to as "Cosmic Canine Extraordinaire" or the phrase "What do you mean Porthos is a girl?" Archer and Trip discussing the finer points of kissing women (interpret any way you want) Must contain the following words (not necessarily together or in order) deranged, rabbit and snirk (for those of you who don't know the meaning of that particular word, a snirk is a cross between a snicker and a smirk) T'Pol must say: "Whatever you want, however you like it, and lead the way." (in no particular order and not necessarily together) Trip saying "Keep your shirt on" and "darlin' " in the same sentence (no particular order)

Rating: K+

Disclaimer: The Scavenger Hunt is a piece of fan fiction, written with the authoress’ respect and appreciation of the works of Gene Roddenberry. The characters, settings, and history of Enterprise are borrowed. No profit is being made by the writing of this piece of fan fiction.

Archiving: Please just tell me where to find it.

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"How you like it?" Trip leaned back in his chair, holding one of the sub- commander's hands in his own.

"Fine." The Vulcan's eyes raced around the room as if she were barely tolerating his touch.

"Might need a second coat," the commander murmured to himself. He looked up to see the sub-commander looking down at him with a very peculiar look.

"Sister and cousins." He cleared his throat and explained away. She inclined her head in acceptance.

"Should you not wear this as well?"

Trip broke out into laughter at the thought. "No."

"But the list did not specify."

"I don't care. I'm not wearing fingernail polish."

"And risk failure on a technicality?"

"I'm not wearing fingernail polish, T'Pol." The commander rose from the chair and looked his partner straight in the eyes. "Just, no."

"Whatever you want," T'Pol whispered as he grabbed the drawing and moved to the bed. She palmed the open bottle of polish and followed him.

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"Commander, we are restricted on time," T'Pol chimed from beside the door.

"Keep your shirt on, darlin'." Trip threw their bag over his shoulder and met her at the exit.

The sub-commander delicately raised an eyebrow. "It was never in danger of coming off."

Tucker snickered as he reached passed her and opened the door. He made an overly graceful arc with his arm once it had opened.

"Ladies first," he said in a gentlemanly manner.

"Please commander, lead the way," the Vulcan insisted, her hands ever behind her back. Trip looked at her a moment before smiling.

"Alright. Where to?"

"The Mess Hall would be the most logical choice," T'Pol replied as she tossed the now closed bottle of nail polish on the man's bunk and followed him out the door.

Little did he know that he had a small purple dot on the back of his neck.

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"Lieutenant Reed!" the doctor called as he struggled to catch up with his partner. Malcolm begrudgingly stopped and shoved his hands in his uniform's pockets.

"Sorry, Doc," he stated as Doctor Phlox finally arrived at his side. They continued their advance, the human taking up a slower pace.

"Apology accepted." Malcolm nodded his head slightly and began to speed up again. The doctor sighed softly and matched his pace.

"May I ask you a question, Lieutenant?"

"You just did." After a moment, he looked over to the doctor before hanging his head. "Sorry, go ahead."

"I believe that you were not looking forward to participating in this activity. Annoyed would describe your outlook actually," Doctor Phlox spoke in a tone that let the lieutenant know that he was being analyzed. He was always using that tone when he was trying to figure something out. "But now you are taking on this task with surprising zeal. Do you see this as a personal affront to your abilities?"

"No." Lieutenant Reed smiled awkwardly before returning to a more determined mask. "Yes."

The doctor looked to him questioningly.

"In a manner. You see, I'm the Chief Security Officer. What type of security officer would I look to be if I'm not able to find and attain twenty simple items on a silly list? Not a good one," Malcolm finished on a sullen note.

"Don't be so hard on yourself, Lieutenant."

"I know it seems foolish doctor but . . . but I just have to win."

They continued on in silence until the doctor announced in a cheery and far too loud -in the lieutenant's opinion - voice, "And win we shall, Lieutenant!"

He ended the statement with an inhumanly broad smile that caused shivers to crawl down the human's back. Malcolm returned the gesture feebly. Walking with more determination and with chins held slightly higher, the two continued on their way to the Mess Hall.

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Commander Tucker and Sub-Commander T'Pol rounded the last corner before reaching the corridor that opened onto the Mess Hall. They had made their journey in relative silence, more due to T'Pol's preference than the Commander's.

"Whadda ya think the prize's gonna be?" Trip spit out, unable to handle the silence any longer.

Before the Vulcan could respond a distraction appeared in the middle of the hall not twenty feet away.

"Well if it ain't the local Cosmic Canine Extraordinaire!"

Porthos approached at the commander's friendly welcome, his mouth ajar with a canine smile. At the same moment, Lieutenant Reed and Doctor Phlox appeared at the other end of the corridor. It did not take them long to spot the pooch.

"He's wearing a spiked collar!" Trip hissed to T'Pol. Apparently the other team had noticed as well.

Malcolm and Trip froze, staring across the corridor at one another. Both were waiting to see who would make the first move. Meanwhile, Porthos was getting closer and closer to the commanders. Reed had to make his move.

The lieutenant started out in a quick jog but when the commander set off as well, he advanced into an outright run. The pup stopped and looked about himself in confusion. He didn't have long to worry about his situation before he was lifted off his feet and into the arms of the commander.

"I saw him first!" Malcolm objected, reaching for the dog. Tucker tried to avoid the lieutenant's grasp but the man firmly got a hold of the animal in his arms.

"Uh-uh! We saw 'em first and ya know it, Malcolm. Naw, let go!" Trip pulled away from the man. Malcolm held on tightly. Porthos yelped in a plea for help, trying to squirm his way out of the men's arms.

"Put the dog down!" Jonathon Archer barked from the end of the hall. Malcolm put his hands in the air and backed away, while Trip slowly placed the dog back on his feet.

Porthos shot off like lightning and within seconds was in his loving owner's arms. Jon held his pet possessively and sent a cutting glare down the short distance to his senior officers. Slowly, each step marking his displeasure with the situation, he approached the two teams.

"Cap'n-" Trip began before he was cut off.

"I don't want to hear it, Commander," Archer interrupted. "I was just comin' here to check up on your guys' progress. I thought it'd be a nice surprise for the first I came across to get Porthos' collar. I see I underestimated your enthusiasm.”

"Sorry, sir," Malcolm murmured, head hung. Actually all four of the team members seemed to be uncomfortable in the captain's presence at that moment. T'Pol kept a rigid back, hands held behind her, not looking directly at the captain but at the wall plating to his side. While, Dr. Phlox seemed not to be able to keep still, his hands moving from behind his back to before him to behind him again.

"Don't apologize to me, lieutenant. Apologize to Porthos." At that moment, the captain's communicator chirped. He reached inside his uniform arm pocket and pulled out the device. "Archer."

"Sir, you're needed on the bridge," a young man's voice informed from over the small device.

"I'm on my way." Captain Archer never took his eyes off the crewmen before him. He replaced the communicator and returned his full attention back to the matter at hand.

"Sorry, Porthos," Lieutenant Reed apologized humbly, trying not to think about the fact that he was apologizing to a dog.

"Yeah, sorry, Porthos," Trip added. Out of the corner of his eyes he could see something flicker over the sub-commander's face. Was it amusement? No it couldn't be, Trip finally thought to himself.

"You have a half an hour. Make the best of it." Captain Archer turned and headed back down the way he came. The dog's little paws rested over his captain's shoulder, his head resting on his paws, staring at the crewmen as he was carried away.

The four stood there in silence a few long moments before Doctor Phlox spoke.

"Are you going to the Mess Hall, too?"

-----

Ensign Sato stood in the front of the mess hall, looking over the relatively small amounts of people congregated in the room. Travis Mayweather stood to her side, swaying slightly back and forth. She finally sighed and turned to the young man.

"Well." She paused and bit the tip of a finger in thought. The door opened to the mess hall and both turned to see who entered. In walked none other than Doctor Phlox, Lieutenant Reed, and Commanders Tucker and T'Pol.

With a territorial aggressiveness, Hoshi went to the first table she saw and began interrogating its occupants.

"Hey. How are you? OK, do either of you have . . ." Mayweather took over and began to read off what they had left to attain.

T'Pol and Commander Tucker took off in one direction while the Lieutenant and Doctor set off in the other, copying the ensigns' tactics.

"Hey girls," Commander Tucker greeted at one table. The women smiled shyly and listened attentively. Meanwhile, Sub-Commander T'Pol strayed over to the food set out for breakfast.

"Hello, Ensign Cutler," Doctor Phlox greeted his young associate. "You wouldn't happen to have a tattoo would you?"

Cutler raised an eyebrow and a small smirk graced her lips. "Well . . ."

"Commander Tucker, please open the bag."

"T'Pol, an apple's not on our list."

The Sub-Commander gave a look that made the commander feel as if he missed something terribly obvious.

"Commander," T'Pol began patiently, holding the apple up shoulder height, "this apple qualifies as both an alien fruit and something organic from your home world."

"An apple's not an alien fruit." Trip smiled charmingly, amused that he had found a flaw in the Vulcan's logic.

"It is to me, Commander."

Trip's grin fell and he thought for a moment. "Damn, T'Pol. Ya good."

"Hey, Hosh." Travis tapped her on the shoulder, interrupting her words with a young crewman. She looked up expectantly. "Why's the doctor following Ensign Cutler out of the Mess Hall?"

Hoshi couldn't help but let a wide grin crack her face. "Any distraction's fine with me."

"Hey, T'Pol!" Commander Trip called. T'Pol looked over from where she had been interrogating a crewman, who was now cowering in his seat. She didn't mean to do the to people, Trip knew, but she still was somehow able to do so. It was a gift, a super power really. Trip smiled deviously as she walked over to him. A super power every Vulcan was born with.

"Yes, Commander?"

Trip pulled out the small vial from inside their pack and turned his back to the room.

"I need your help with this."

T'Pol's eyes widened and she took a step back.

"I'm not goin' to fill it with real spit." Commander Tucker grabbed a glass of water and handed it to T'Pol. "I need you to help pour and block the view. We can't have Reed and Hoshi tellin' on us."

Sub-Commander T'Pol watched as the man removed the stopper from the vial. Tucker looked back at her and rolled his eyes.

"Move up here before they suspect something." Trip pulled the Vulcan over to his side by her wrist. "Now pour some in here. Not too much, we want it to be believable."

T'Pol was about to do as instructed but stopped suddenly. "Is this not cheating?"

"Not if they dunna 'bout it." Trip smirked and encouraged the sub-commander to pour.

"But . . ."

"Come on! It's not gonna hurt."

T'Pol thought for a moment before returning to the task.

"That’ta girl."

"Lieutenant," Doctor Phlox said from Malcolm's side. "You may check image of a tattoo off our list."

Malcolm's eyes lit up and he seemed to stand a bit straighter. "Really? So that's where you went off to?"

"Yes," the doctor said with a self-satisfied smile.

Hoshi sat at a table with a young and rather handsome ensign. She swished her hair back behind her shoulder and smiled sheepishly. He smiled back, more because of the questions she was asking then anything else.

"So do you have a tattoo . . .on your body?" she asked. He grinned and made her wait a few moments.

"No."

"Umm . . . so you don't have: a leash, a tattoo, or a chef's hat. Umm . . .do you have some alien fruit, on you?"

The man smiled and leaned back in his chair. "Not today. Should have caught me yesterday."

"Oh . . .Oh!" Hoshi covered her mouth with a hand, embarrassed with her outburst and slow catch on.

"Well," she cleared her throat and raised the PADD so that it was covering her blushing face, "how 'bout a wedding ring?"

"Actually, yes." The man pulled out a necklace from underneath his uniform. On the gold chain, was a thick gold wedding ring. Hoshi's jaw dropped and she just stared while he took off the chain and removed the ring. "I'll get this back, right?"

Ensign Sato nodded her head. He reached out and dropped the ring in her hand.

"Good 'cause the little lady would kill me if I lost it. It was nice talking to you, Ensign, and good luck with the hunt." With that he stood up and left the Mess Hall and Hoshi with a stupefied look upon her face.

A young male officer entered the Mess Hall at a slow jog. He stopped and looked around the room. Seeing who he was looking for, he headed over to where Dr. Phlox and Lieutenant Reed were speaking with two young women.

"We're sorry but like we told you, sir, we already gave everything we had to Commander Tucker."

"Lieutenant, I have what you asked for," the man announced proudly to his superior.

"Good job, Rooney. Put it in the bag." The young man did as he was told and placed a wooden flute inside the now nearly full satchel.

"See you in the weapons locker tomorrow, sir."

The lieutenant nodded his head at the crewman's goodbye and picked up the PADD.

"We have five more items," he grumbled to himself.

"Commander."

Trip looked up at the sound of the sub-commander's voice. "Yes?"

The Vulcan walked over slowly to where her partner was sitting and going over their inventory. "I have acquired a few more items," she stated in a low and soft voice. He looked around the room, trying to figure out why she was being so secretive.

"O.K.," he replied in the same tone. "What is it?"

She leaned up against the table to the commander's side and tried to act as nonchalant as possible. T'Pol opened her hands and placed the items on top of the others that Trip had already pulled out.

"Lavender body lotion, red lipstick, confetti, a spiked collar! Where'd you get all these, T'Pol?" Tucker exclaimed. She looked at him pointedly before responding in a still hushed tone.

"You may want to lower your voice, Commander."

"Where'd you get all this?"

"Sato."

Trip's grin fell and he furrowed his brows in thought.

"Wait," he paused and looked at the items, "why would Hoshi give you these?"

"She didn't," T'Pol said swiftly and looked around the room to make sure they were not being watched.

"You stole them from her!"

T'Pol's head whipped around. "Commander, lower your voice."

"Sorry, it's just . . . Wow, T'Pol. I don't know if we should do that . . ." he began, running a hand through his hair.

"You put water in the vial," she stated slowly to add effect. He gave her a sidelong look before giving up.

"Ya right, we did." Trip began to stuff the items inside their bag. This game was just getting better and better. He'd never admit it, but stealing and breaking the rules with T'Pol gave him an adrenaline high that raised an otherwise normal scavenger's hunt to a whole new level.

"I wonder where they got this," Trip mused, holding the spiked collar in his hands.

"I presumed that they attained it from the captain," T'Pol replied, taking the collar from his hands and placing it inside their satchel.

"I dun' think so," Commander Tucker said, "Porthos' collar had silver spikes. That one has gold. Plus, Cap'n set off to the bridge with Porthos, and his collar."

T'Pol seemed uninterested in the origin of the collar and instead focused on organizing the items they had attained. Meanwhile, Trip leaned back in his chair and snuck a look at Ensign Sato, who was sitting with a man. He seemed to have handed her a ring of some sort and left the table.

Hoshi stood from the table and wandered over to where Ensign Mayweather had been speaking with two young women. She knew these women had already been interviewed by both other teams and was a little frustrated that Mayweather would waste his time with them.

"Travis, where's our bag?"

Ensign Mayweather looked up from his conversation and pointed to a table a short distance away.

"There." He quickly returned to his joke, that moments later reduced the girls into short fits of giggles. Hoshi rolled her eyes and moved on to the table he had pointed to.

She picked up the bag and immediately knew something was wrong. It felt lighter than it used to be. Hoshi swiftly opened the bag and began rummaging through its contents. She threw it down with a huff.

"Travis!" she exclaimed. He abandoned his flirtations at the ensign's tone and joined her side.

"What's wrong?" Travis asked, concerned. Hoshi picked up the bag and let it drop again.

"We've been robbed!"

"What?" Mayweather's eyes widened to startling proportions as he took up the bag and started digging about as the Ensign had earlier.

"Robbed! Someone has stolen from us!" She went on to rant in several different languages, none of which Travis recognized.

"But who?"

Hoshi looked around the Mess Hall with squinted and suspicious eyes. Finally her eyes fell upon the lieutenant and the doctor. Malcolm was closing his backpack and seemed a little too self-satisfied. Of course, the Chief of Security. Who else would be so devious and so good at it?

"Malcolm," Hoshi murmured under her breath. She swiftly crossed the room to where the other team was standing and talking with each other.

"You did it, didn't you?" Ensign Sato spit out, with a forced smile. Malcolm looked back at her, taking a moment to gather a reply.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Ensign."

"Alright, then would you like to explain why four items have been stolen from our bag?" Hoshi shot back, trying to be as civil as she could. Usually she'd handle it better but she just hated cheaters.

"Are you sure, Ensign?" the doctor asked from the lieutenant’s side.

"Yes, we're sure," Mayweather confirmed, looking in the bag again.

"I don't know what to tell you, Ensigns. Other than we weren't the ones who pilfered from your bag," Malcolm informed, earnestly. Hoshi and Travis exchanged a glance. He seemed like he was telling the truth, in Sato's opinion.

"Can we check your bag to make sure?" she asked, a bit calmer than her previous statements.

"Sure." Malcolm handed over the bag and folded his arms across his chest, overseeing their search. He trusted Hoshi but he still didn't want to take a chance that she was pulling a ruse on him.

"They're telling the truth." Hoshi gave the bag back half-heartedly. "Then who stole from us?"

"There's only two other people that would get my vote," Lieutenant Reed said, pointedly looking over in T'Pol and Trip's direction.

"Where was your bag?" Doctor Phlox asked, appearing to have drawn the same conclusion as his partner.

"It was right over there on that empty table," Mayweather explained. The doctor nodded his head.

"I saw T'Pol over there next to a bag a few minutes ago. I thought it was theirs."

Both Hoshi's and Travis' jaws fell open as they turned and looked in the Vulcan's direction.

"T'Pol?" Ensign Mayweather choked.

Hoshi didn't take her gaze off the woman. She watched as the sub-commander looked around the room suspiciously, while leaning up against the table beside the commander. That was more than a little unusual in its self. Trip was to her side, throwing things haphazardly into their backpack; he appeared a little too eager to have that bag filled and closed. After he was done, the sub-commander moved away and sat in the chair opposite him.

"That little . . . chienne!" Hoshi grumbled under her breath, stomping her way over to the commanders. Travis followed close behind.

"That sounded French," Doctor Phlox mused.

"It is," Malcolm confirmed, turning his back on what he knew was destined to be a scene. "She called her umm . . ." He cleared his throat. "A bitch. Essentially."

Hoshi set off across the room with the full intention of giving Tucker and T'Pol a piece of her mind. She'd expect it somewhat from Trip, if he took it serious enough and thought it would do no harm. But she never would expect it from T'Pol. Though the more she thought about it, she should've. Logic governed the Vulcan and logic could be twisted any way they wanted.

It seemed to take her forever to get to the commanders. She had to move around tables and wait for crewmen to move their seats. Finally she made it to the woman's side and opened her mouth to give a good rant in the Vulcan's own language, respectively of course. She wasn't stupid.

"Time's up!"

Captain Archer walked to the front of the room. All three teams gathered in front of him, their packs ready. He looked at them and their collections and smiled shortly.

"I'm very proud of you all and how you've taken this game so seriously. I can't be long so I'll make this quick." Jonathon Archer stood straight, with his hands behind his back. "While you were on the hunt, I was called up to the bridge. We came across a transport ship that has invited us to shore leave on their planet."

The senior officers, excluding T'Pol, shared quick looks as they waited for the captain to continue.

"And so, I'll need you to come up to the bridge as soon as you've found someone to take care of those. I'll expect you in a few." He quickly turned and attempted to leave.

"But sir!" Hoshi interrupted. Captain Archer turned and looked at the ensign patiently.

"What about the game?" Lieutenant Reed asked in her stead.

"What about the game?"

"Who're the winners?" Hoshi pushed, trying to not sound too needy.

"We don't have time to tally. And the game was just to take your minds off the boredom. Since we've come across something of interest, there's really no need for it anymore," Jon explained away. "So, you're all winners and shore leave’s your prize."

With a quick grin, he exited the room, leaving most of his senior staff speechless.

"Bugger!" Malcolm cursed under his breath.

"You can say that again," Commander Tucker stated in a friendly manner. "And we would've won too."

Hoshi turned to the man and his partner who was opening their bag. She raised her hands on her hips and managed to look very menacing for such a small woman.

"Because you stole from us, Commander," Ensign Sato threw back at him.

"I dunna what ya talkin' 'bout, Ensign," he rebuffed. T'Pol finally pulled out a few items from the bag and turned to the young woman.

"I believe these are yours, Ensign," she remarked as she handed the lipstick, bag of confetti, and lotion to the woman. Hoshi opened her hands and took the items, her mouth ajar. She looked pointedly at her commander and he cleared his throat and tried to avoid her gaze.

"Thanks, T'Pol," Commander Tucker said through clenched teeth.

"This is yours as well," the Vulcan said matter-of factly as she handed the collar to the ensign. "The commander also expressed interest in where you acquired that item."

"Yeah," Trip picked up, gladly accepting the distraction, "where'd ya find it?"

"Travis' quarters," she said with a smirk. "I think this is yours."

Hoshi handed the spiked collar over to the blushing ensign. Both Commander Tucker and Lieutenant Reed chocked in a sort of laugh. Mayweather faked a laugh of his own and took the collar.

"Laugh all you want. But it has its uses," he said through a devilish smirk. The group stopped laughing immediately and watched as the Ensign left the hall.

"Well this has been pleasant. But I must report to sick bay," the doctor said, interrupting the silence. "Good day."

"I suppose we should go, too," Reed said to his crewmates.

The four disposed of their bags to the two women sitting at a table nearby and headed to the bridge. Looking back, they knew that they had taken the game a little too far but it had done what it was supposed to. They no longer were bored with the monotony that had plagued their duties for the past couple weeks and they were left with memories of the game they were not soon to forget.

Especially Ensign Sato, she did not forget the commanders’ actions when they took their shore leave. It took a painful and rather long, in the commander's opinion, recovery for his severe sunburn to heal and sub- commander T'Pol never did find her candles again.

And, of course, everyone tried to forget what they learned about Travis Mayweather that day.

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FIN

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