Disclaimer: Namco owns it all and no offense to any of the Tekken voice
announcers! A friend gave me this idea!
Heihachi and Kazuya stand in the middle of the floor where the player duals
Kazuya in Tekken 2.
HEIHACHI: "I will take back all that is mine!"
KAZUYA: "Over my dead body..."
HEIHACHI: "So be it.."
They go into their stances and a loud voice announces. "Round 1! Fight!"
They fight for a few minutes and Kazuya beats Heihachi, knocking him across
the room. The voice speaks again. "You lose!"
HEIHACHI: "Ow, that hurt!"
"Round 2! Fight!" Heihachi gets up and fights with Kazuya again. Kazuya,
once again, defeats him. Heihachi sits up as the voice echoes out "You
HEIHACHI: "Ow, how long is this fight kid?"
KAZUYA: "Oh, hang on" *checks* "Wow, 5 rounds"
"Round 3! Fight!" They fight the 3rd round and Kazuya beats Heihachi again.
HEIHACHI: "I know, already! I've lost 2 times! You don't need to keep
"Hey I'm just doin' my job man, read the credits, I announce the fights."
"Oh right, Ahem. Round 4! Fight!" Heihachi gets up again and goes into his
stance. They fight once more, resulting in Kazuya once again beating
Heihachi. "You lose!"
HEIHACHI: "THAT'S IT! PAUSE THIS DAMN GAME!"
ME: "Whoa, chill spikey." *hits START button*
Heihachi gets up and storms across the floor, shoving Kazuya out of the way
and dissapears into the shadows. The lights come on with Heihachi by a
switch and a big ladder. He snorts and begins to ascend up the ladder where
there's a announcer's box. He crawls up to the top and kicks the door in.
HEIHACHI: "Okay you ugly Mutha! It's go time! You and me!"
ANNOUNCER: *Yelps* "Don't hurt me" *whines*
HEIHACHI: "You've pissed me off for the last time buddy!"
Heihachi beats the shit outta him and performs one of his Tekken 2 combos
on him, kicking him out the window to his death.
HEIHACHI: "Annoying mother-bitch."
KAZUYA: "What the heck!"
Heihachi climbs back down and storms back across the floor.
KAZUYA: "Okay I guess we can fight without the announcer." *shrugs*
HEIHACHI: "Don't count on it." *as he walks by, he kicks Kazuya in the nuts
then drags him by the ankle out of the room, and up the mountain, over to
the volcano, picks him up and throws him into it's mouth"
KAZUYA: "We still got 6 rounds you piece of
HEIHACHI: "We'll finish it in 20 years! Damn man, sons." *storms off*
Meanwhile as Heihachi walks off, the Tekken 3 guy stands by with a mic and
starts to announce:
ANNOUNCER: "Heihachi Mishima, wi--"
Heihachi grabs the mic and decks him, then throws the mic into the volcano.
HEIHACHI: "SHUT UP!"
He continues to walk off and the credits roll, the woman starts to sing.
HEIHACHI: "Don't even think about it!"
SINGER GIRL: "Sorry."
My attempt at another comedy. How did I do? Please send some reviews.