Naraku's Guide to Plagiarism, AKA Plagiarism for Duhmmies
Naraku as told to Celyia
To those "authors" who need so desperately to brush up on their plagiarizing skills.
Thanks, guys. I was worried I was going to piss you guys off with this one. Thanks for the support. :-) For those of you who are curious, yes, I tried to handle this in a more mature fashion. I've been at it for the better part of a week. :/ I even warned her what I was going to do. Unfortunately, sometimes actions speak louder than words (ironic since ::grin:: in this case, the action *is* words) and voila! this fic came about. OH! As for the chapter... I forgot that I wrote "Principles" as Chapter 2. Ooops!
Wordy, isn't she? Unlike the other authors who actually have style and grace, that one insists dribbling nonsense. It defies my comprehension that anyone would intentionally plagiarize her but hey! the way I figure it, if everyone had as good of taste as I do, everyone in the world would be one of my spawns.
Heh. I kill me. (And I'll kill you. And you. And yes, even you)
Anyway, the idea of this little foray into the writing world is to help all of you wannabes become a little more efficient and ruthless in your endeavors. In all honesty, people try to make the Evil Side a laughing stock as it is and I refuse to stand by and allow your stunning incompetence to assist them.
So for the sake of all that is Nefarious (tm), listen up and learn.
-Naruku, 4 January 2003
Chapter 1 - Plagiarism: Is It In You?
The decision has been made to post a story and now, you've come to the dreaded crossroads of the writing world.
To plagiarize or not to plagiarize. That, I do say, is the bloody question.
Heh. Damn, I'm funny. You'd think with an employer who cracks jokes like Indiana cracks his whip, Kagura would never try to run away. The dumb bitch. The DUMB, betraying bitch. The dumb, betraying bitch with NO sense of fashion (feathers? What's the deal with the freaking feathers!) and a penchant for trying to escape.
Escape. Um. Excuse me a moment.
Okay. Back. Still in her chains and as grovel-y as ever. Heh. It's good to be evil.
As I was saying, you have a very important decision to make that will affect the rest of your fanfic career. You can choose to labor and sweat and create a story from the recesses of your own imagination (and if you decide to go that route, PLEASE stop making me lust for Kikyou. That's soooo fifty years ago), or you can make life easy and plagiarize!
In order to help you, the Duhmmie neophyte, in your efforts to walk on the Dark Side, I've compiled a list of reasons for and against plagiarizing.
|1. You'll never need to put effort into thinking or writing again!
||1. Being caught can lead to embarrassment, banishment, and distrust. (Heh. Like you need that anyway)|
|2. Receive acclaim for work you never did, leaving you free to... um... free to lead a life of Nefariousness(tm).
||2. Being caught will immediately make all your work suspect. Heh. Big deal. It's not like you DID any of it, anyway.|
|3. Frustrate and discourage the real authors from writing and posting. (Please. As a favor to all that is Nefarious in the world, do it. Get that dumb "Celyia" chick out of here. If I have to read one more inanely fluffy story about Fluffy, I'm going to throw up)
||3. If you are a whiney do-gooder, or even a person with a modicum of self-respect ::shudders::, you might actually start to feel guilty. (Heh. Wuss)||4. (My favorite!) Demean your audience by assuming they won't get what's going on. Heh. If that isn't Nefarious, I don't know what is.||
Now that you have the facts before you, make your decision.
Go on. I'm waiting
If you decide to take the whiney way out (WUSS! RUN HOME TO MOMMY! ::ahem::), don't let the figurative door hit you on your not-so-figurative ass. But if you want to continue learning how to progress in your nefarious deeds, follow me to Chapter 2.
AHEM! Now "Principles" is coming up. And Baka Deshi -- hehe. Sesshoumaru is STILL my mane (and tail?) man! *cough* *ahem* Neeeext!